Nowadays because of digital technology, it is possible for not only studios but also individuals to produce their own films. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?
Today, Films are
possible
produced by not only studios but Change the adjective
possibly
also
individuals since the advance of digital technology. In my own perspective, It is a great step forward which bring
many benefits for cinematographers. The reason for my opinion is justified Correct subject-verb agreement
brings
further
.
Firstly
, the most crucial advantage is increased creativity and diversity of content creator
. Fix the agreement mistake
creators
Availability
of digital technology Correct article usage
The availability
makes
people easily to share Verb problem
allows
about
their unique experiences and views. They can Change preposition
apply
using
only one Change the verb form
use
be using
tools
Change to a singular noun
tool
such
as phone
to make an amazing Correct article usage
a phone
movie
. The result are
various Change the verb form
is
type
of media Fix the agreement mistake
types
landscape
which depend on Fix the agreement mistake
landscapes
individual's
desire. Correct article usage
the individual's
Moreover
, content creator
can be rich since they can earn a lot of money when they upload Fix the agreement mistake
creators
the
videos to several Correct article usage
apply
website
. Change to a plural noun
websites
For example
, Atta Halilintar, one of famous
Correct article usage
the famous
youtuber
in Indonesia, makes various videos about daily Correct your spelling
YouTuber
live
which have more than a billion viewers in the world. Replace the word
life
Subsequently
, The creation lead
him Change the verb form
leads
becoming
Change the verb form
to become
top
five Correct article usage
the top
richers
people in Indonesia.
Correct your spelling
richest
riches
richer
Secondly
, Aspiring filmmakers no
need longer access to Correct your spelling
do
proffesional
studios to create high-quality content. Nowadays, they can Correct your spelling
professional
using
cheaper tools which Change the verb form
use
be using
is decreased
the cost Wrong verb form
decreases
production
. Change preposition
of production
For example
, Ria, one of movie
Correct article usage
the movie
maker
in Indonesia, is using Fix the agreement mistake
makers
camera
to take Add an article
the camera
a camera
the
videos and Correct article usage
apply
laptop
for editing. She Correct article usage
a laptop
spend
Wrong verb form
spent
fund
under ten million which is totally different Fix the agreement mistake
funds
with
Change preposition
from
cost
Correct article usage
the cost
production
in studios more than twenty million. Change preposition
of production
Additionally
, she always create
a Change the verb form
creates
movie
that related
Wrong verb form
relates
with
herself so she becomes the artist in her project.
In my own perspective, Change preposition
to
the
technology Correct article usage
apply
lead
Change the verb form
leads
positive
development in Change preposition
to positive
individuals
Change the noun form
individual
movie
maker
since they easily Fix the agreement mistake
makers
to
share their films and Fix the infinitive
apply
cheaper
.
In conclusion, there are many benefits for individuals which will Add a missing verb
are cheaper
be rise
Change the verb form
rise
creativity
. Change preposition
in creativity
Then
, from this
Correct determiner usage
these
skills
they get a lot of money.Add a comma
skills,
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coherence cohesion
To improve your coherence and cohesion, work on making your sentences flow more smoothly by using appropriate linking words and ensuring grammatical accuracy. For instance, use phrases like 'as a result', 'in addition', and 'for instance' to create a smoother transition between points.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that your conclusion clearly restates your main points and links back to your introduction. This will give your essay a well-rounded structure and make it easier to follow.
task achievement
To achieve a higher score in task achievement, provide more specific and varied examples to support your points. This will make your arguments more convincing and better illustrated.
task achievement
You provide a clear stance on the topic and justify your opinion with relevant points, which is a strong aspect of task achievement.
coherence cohesion
Your essay includes an introduction and a conclusion, which is essential for a well-structured response.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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