Nowadays because of digital technology, it is possible for not only studios but also individuals to produce their own films. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

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Today, Films are
possible
Change the adjective
possibly
show examples
produced by not only studios but
also
Linking Words
individuals since the advance of digital technology. In my own perspective, It is a great step forward which
bring
Correct subject-verb agreement
brings
show examples
many benefits for cinematographers. The reason for my opinion is justified
further
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.
Firstly
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, the most crucial advantage is increased creativity and diversity of content
creator
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creators
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.
Availability
Correct article usage
The availability
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of digital technology
makes
Verb problem
allows
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people easily to share
about
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apply
show examples
their unique experiences and views. They can
using
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use
be using
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only one
tools
Change to a singular noun
tool
show examples
such
Linking Words
as
phone
Correct article usage
a phone
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to make an amazing
movie
Use synonyms
. The result
are
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is
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various
type
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types
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of media
landscape
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landscapes
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which depend on
individual's
Correct article usage
the individual's
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desire.
Moreover
Linking Words
, content
creator
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creators
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can be rich since they can earn a lot of money when they upload
the
Correct article usage
apply
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videos to several
website
Change to a plural noun
websites
show examples
.
For example
Linking Words
, Atta Halilintar, one of
famous
Correct article usage
the famous
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youtuber
Correct your spelling
YouTuber
in Indonesia, makes various videos about daily
live
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life
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which have more than a billion viewers in the world.
Subsequently
Linking Words
, The creation
lead
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leads
show examples
him
becoming
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to become
show examples
top
Correct article usage
the top
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five
richers
Correct your spelling
richest
riches
richer
people in Indonesia.
Secondly
Linking Words
, Aspiring filmmakers
no
Correct your spelling
do
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need longer access to
proffesional
Correct your spelling
professional
studios to create high-quality content. Nowadays, they can
using
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use
be using
show examples
cheaper tools which
is decreased
Wrong verb form
decreases
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the cost
production
Change preposition
of production
show examples
.
For example
Linking Words
, Ria, one of
Use synonyms
movie
Correct article usage
the movie
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maker
Fix the agreement mistake
makers
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in Indonesia, is using
camera
Add an article
the camera
a camera
show examples
to take
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
videos and
laptop
Correct article usage
a laptop
show examples
for editing. She
spend
Wrong verb form
spent
show examples
fund
Fix the agreement mistake
funds
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under ten million which is totally different
with
Change preposition
from
show examples
cost
Correct article usage
the cost
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production
Change preposition
of production
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in studios more than twenty million.
Additionally
Linking Words
, she always
create
Change the verb form
creates
show examples
a
movie
Use synonyms
that
related
Wrong verb form
relates
show examples
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
herself so she becomes the artist in her project. In my own perspective,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
technology
lead
Change the verb form
leads
show examples
positive
Change preposition
to positive
show examples
development in
individuals
Change the noun form
individual
show examples
movie
Use synonyms
maker
Fix the agreement mistake
makers
show examples
since they easily
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
share their films and
cheaper
Add a missing verb
are cheaper
show examples
. In conclusion, there are many benefits for individuals which will
be rise
Change the verb form
rise
show examples
creativity
Change preposition
in creativity
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.
Then
Linking Words
, from
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
skills
Add a comma
skills,
show examples
they get a lot of money.
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coherence cohesion
To improve your coherence and cohesion, work on making your sentences flow more smoothly by using appropriate linking words and ensuring grammatical accuracy. For instance, use phrases like 'as a result', 'in addition', and 'for instance' to create a smoother transition between points.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that your conclusion clearly restates your main points and links back to your introduction. This will give your essay a well-rounded structure and make it easier to follow.
task achievement
To achieve a higher score in task achievement, provide more specific and varied examples to support your points. This will make your arguments more convincing and better illustrated.
task achievement
You provide a clear stance on the topic and justify your opinion with relevant points, which is a strong aspect of task achievement.
coherence cohesion
Your essay includes an introduction and a conclusion, which is essential for a well-structured response.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • democratization of content
  • barriers to entry
  • media landscape
  • financial backing
  • unique perspectives
  • high-quality content
  • market saturation
  • economic impact
  • independent filmmakers
  • traditional studios
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