Individuals should not be allowed to carry guns as it increases crime and violence in society. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#individuals #guns #increases #crime #violence #society

The line graph presents the

rate

of the

Population

in Pour Asian

Correct your spelling

countries

countres

Correct your spelling

countries

itag

Correct your spelling

tag

citres

Correct your spelling

cities

aneine

Correct your spelling

online

anyone

engine

yoar

Correct your spelling

your

year

lato to 2020, with

guess

Add a comma

guess,

show examples

farthe

Correct your spelling

farther

far the

neites

Correct your spelling

nets

Change the article

apply

show examples

2040. The

rate

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

population

Malaysia

and

Indonsic

Correct your spelling

Indonesia

are the highest countries

inthe

Correct your spelling

in the

number of people,

while

Correct your spelling

the Philippines

philippines

and

Thiland

Correct your spelling

Thailand

are the dounterentages in the

populaticus

Correct your spelling

population

populations

than s

Malaysia

and

Indonsia

Correct your spelling

Indonesia

. In 1970 the

population

rates of

Malaysia

and Indonsia were between 10-30% Indonsia's

rate

increased sharpiy

throghout

Correct your spelling

throughout

the

years

until 2040

Rephrase

when it

show examples

reach

Wrong verb form

reached

show examples

the Presntage 60%.

while

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

Malaysia

goes up between the

years

1980 to 2040 and

reaching

Wrong verb form

reaches

show examples

almost 85% • During the year

197

Add a comma

197,

show examples

the

population

ratten

Correct your spelling

rattan

for in

Correct article usage

the philippines

show examples

philippines

Change the capitalization

Philippines

show examples

and

Thiland

Correct your spelling

Thailand

were betwixt 10-30% •

PhiliPPines

Correct your spelling

Philippines

was

Change preposition

show examples

the

Correct article usage

show examples

rate

of 30%.

Promthe

Correct your spelling

From the

year 1970 - 1986,

Then

it ea wanted up to 50%

inthe

Correct your spelling

in the

1990.

Furthermore

, in the

years

between 1990 - 2020 the

rate

of Papulation in

Correct article usage

the philippines

show examples

philippines

Change the capitalization

Philippines

show examples

goes down until the year 2030-2040 it

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

clearly

Change the word

clear

show examples

notic

Correct your spelling

notice

that the

rate

became stable from 45 - 50% • It is

intersting

Correct your spelling

interesting

notic

Correct your spelling

notice

note

that the

Percentge

Correct your spelling

percentage

for

Population

Thiland

Correct your spelling

Thailand

from the

Years

1970 - 2020 was not stable.

Then

in 2030 - 2040 it

becoms

Correct your spelling

becomes

increase

inthe

Correct your spelling

in the

rate

of 45%.

Submitted by dinaum063 on Sat Aug 10 2024

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coherence cohesion

Introduction and Conclusion: Include a clear introduction and conclusion to provide a complete structure to your essay. This will help the reader understand the purpose and main findings of the analysis.

coherence cohesion

Logical Structure: Ensure your essay follows a logical structure. Each paragraph should cover one main idea that supports the overall argument. Use transitional phrases to connect ideas smoothly.

task achievement

Grammar and Spelling: Pay attention to grammar and spelling errors. Proofread your work to avoid mistakes such as 'itag n citres', 'dounterentages', and 'ea wanted up'. These errors can distract the reader and obscure your message.

task achievement

Clarity and Precision: Aim for clear and precise language. Avoid vague phrases like 'interestingly to notic'. Be specific and use precise terms to describe the data and trends. For example, 'increased sharply' instead of 'increased sharpiy'.

task achievement

Data Interpretation: Ensure that your analysis of the data is accurate and clearly presented. Clearly distinguish between the different countries and their population trends, and offer specific percentages where possible to support your points.

task achievement

Attempted Analysis: The essay makes an effort to analyze population trends in four Asian countries, showing an understanding of the task requirements.

coherence cohesion

Comparison of Trends: The essay makes comparisons between the different countries, which demonstrates an attempt to understand and convey the nuances of the data.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
43Grammar mistakes
 

6 paragraphs

205 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Individuals should not be allowed to carry guns as it increases crime and violence in society. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Fully explain your ideas

The government should spend more money on medical research to protect citizens’ health rather than on protecting the environment. Do you agree or disagree?

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

the best way to reduce poverty in developing countries is by giving up to six years of free education, so that they can at least read, write and use numbers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?