Holding International games such as The Olympic Games is an exciting event. Some people think that it has positive effects while other argue that it is a waste of money. Discuss both sides of view and give your own opinion.

There are multiple universities which offer
this
program.
Nevertheless
, the curriculum offered by
this
university has a perfect balance between the core subjects and the specializations. First of all, the 5 core subjects thoroughly fit the relationship
among
Change preposition
between
show examples
social, cultural and
behavioral
Change the spelling
behavioural
show examples
factors with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
environmental issues
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
economical
Replace the word
economic
show examples
management in healthcare.
Submitted by luciaagudelomotta on

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coherence cohesion
Your essay has a good attempt at discussing the curriculum offered by the university. However, you need a clear introduction and conclusion to frame your discussion properly.
task achievement
There is a lack of specific examples and detailed explanations to support your points. Try to include more concrete instances or statistics to back up your statements.
task achievement
The mention of the 5 core subjects adds credibility and detail to your essay. This is a good starting point to expand upon in a more structured manner.
coherence cohesion
Your essay attempts to balance different aspects of the curriculum, which shows an understanding of the topic.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • economic impact
  • infrastructure development
  • global attention
  • international reputation
  • cultural exchange
  • national pride
  • sense of achievement
  • fund allocation
  • essential services
  • environmental degradation
  • carbon footprint
  • post-event utilization
  • resource wastage
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