More and more qualified people are moving from poor countries to rich countries to fill vacancies in specialist areas like engineering, computing and medicine . some people believe that by encouraging the movement of such people , rich countries are stealing from poor countries.others feel that this is the only part of the natural movement of workers around the world. discuss the both points of views.

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Nowadays, skilled
people
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are leaving their own
countries
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for more developed
countries
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for the requirements of specialist jobs like engineering, medicine, and computing. Some
people
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believe that
such
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action will lead to a brain drain situation.
While
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others believe that it's normal to immigrate to a richer
country
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, in
this
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essay, I will discuss both perspectives.  On the one hand, the first group says that the immigration of some qualified workers is their right choice.
Due to
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the
life
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that rich
countries
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provide, job opportunities, high salaries, free healthcare, and better education systems, to
unsure
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ensure
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a successful
life
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for themselves and a comfortable
life
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for their families. To illustrate,
according to
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recent studies, America stands out with the largest number of international immigrants.
This
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is
due to
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economic opportunities, seeking better job prospects, education, and a high quality of
life
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.
In addition
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to
this
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,
people
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with
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in
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multi-cultural
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multicultural
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communities can share knowledge and improve human society.
On the other hand
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, the other group believes that moving to rich
countries
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may lead to a lack of human resources in the homeland. When tremendous numbers of skilled workers immigrate to better-economic
countries
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,
this
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affects the quality of the services the native
country
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provides.
Therefore
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, the economic growth of the
country
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will face challenges.
For example
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, many Indian IT professionals and engineers have moved to
countries
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like the United States, contributing to the tech boom there.
As a result
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, it could potentially limit India’s own technological advancements and suffer from a shortage of these specialists.
To sum up
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, the issue of population migration has both advantages and disadvantages, as I mentioned earlier. In my opinion, we should conclude how
people
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can support human beings even if they live in their own or another
country
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.
Submitted by Ayreen🍒 on

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task achievement
While the essay addresses both perspectives, adding more specific examples and real-world data could further substantiate the arguments in favor of each view.
coherence cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, ensure each paragraph flows more seamlessly and introduce linking phrases to better connect ideas. For example, instead of 'On the one hand' and 'On the other hand,' more varied and sophisticated transitions could be employed such as 'Moreover,' 'Additionally,' or 'Conversely,' and 'In contrast,' respectively.
task achievement
Clarify the conclusion by succinctly summarizing the main points discussed and providing a clear stance on the issue. This will enhance the impact of your argument.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction effectively outlines the topic and clearly states that both perspectives will be discussed.
clear comprehensive ideas
Both viewpoints are reasonably well-explored with relevant points provided for each side.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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