IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

plastic bags, plastic bottles and plastic packaging are bad for the environment. what damage does plastic do to environment? what can be done by governments and individuals to solve this problem?

#plastic #bags #bottles #environment #damage #governments #individuals
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Nowadays, our environment suffers from
plastic
 packaging and
plastic
bags
,
plastic
 does
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
great damage to the planet. In
this
 essay, the actions how to solve the
plastic
 problem will be mentioned and what can be done to lower the use of
plastic
 packaging will be discussed.
Firstly
,
plastic
products
 are usually thrown under the ground, so that it is able to cause ground
pollution
,
the
Correct word choice
and the
show examples
 soil becomes poor. It is one of the reasons why trees and plants do not grow as they used to fifty years ago.
Secondly
,
production
Correct article usage
the production
show examples
 of
plastic
 causes air
pollution
. Factories that produce
plastic
bags
, packaging and other
plastic
products
 emit exhaust fumes
to
Change preposition
into
show examples
 the atmosphere. All of the facts mentioned can prove that
plastic
pollution
 plays
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 leading role in the list of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
environmental problems. What
pollution
abutement
Correct your spelling
abutment
abatement
 can be done to lower the risk of earth
damaging
Replace the word
damage
show examples
? First
plastic
bags
 can be
change
Wrong verb form
changed
show examples
 to
bags
 made of natural materials like clothes
of
Correct your spelling
or
show examples
 wood. To realize
this
, factories should lower the production of
plastic
bags
 and change them to more natural
products
.
Moreover
, the problem of ground
pollution
 because of
plastic
 production should be discussed in social media to let people know the scope of
plastic
Add an article
the plastic
show examples
 problem.
Second,
already used
Add a hyphen
already-used
show examples
plastic
 can be recycled
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
 other
products
. There is a Russian program
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 recycling
plastic
 into T-shirts, caps and even balls for football and basketball. In conclusion, I would like to say that, nowadays, people appear as the main reason
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 environmental problems,
the
Correct word choice
and the
show examples
 manufacturing of
plastic
products
 increases the risk of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
further
earth
Change noun form
earth's
show examples
 life. Everything should be done to lower the risk of destroying the planet.
Submitted by permata_188 on

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coherence cohesion
Your essay is well-structured and covers the essential points. However, there are a few areas where clarity can be improved. Make sure to clearly state all parts of the question in your introduction to give a better overview of what your essay will cover.
task achievement
To strengthen your argument, try to include more specific examples or data to support your points about plastic pollution and its effects. This will make your essay more convincing.
general
Be careful with some minor grammatical and expression issues to ensure your ideas are conveyed as clearly as possible. For example, 'clothes of wood' should be 'cloth or wood.'
coherence cohesion
You could improve coherence by linking your ideas more smoothly. For instance, using more transitional phrases like "Furthermore," "Additionally," and "Therefore" can make your essay flow better.
task achievement
While you mentioned a Russian program of recycling plastic, providing more specific details about its effectiveness or results would make your supporting points stronger.
structure
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps in summarizing your points effectively.
content
The essay covers multiple aspects of the plastic pollution problem and discusses feasible solutions for both government and individuals.
coherence
You have utilized a logical structure, making it easy to follow your argument step by step.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • plastic pollution
  • ecosystems
  • wildlife
  • climate change
  • fossil fuels
  • air pollution
  • strict regulations
  • plastic consumption
  • eco-friendly alternatives
  • sustainable packaging
  • recycling facilities
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