IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

You joined a sports club recently and are experiencing some problems. Write to the club manager. In your letter Say why you joined the club Explain about the problems you are experiencing Suggest solutions to fix them.

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Dear Sier, With due respect, I am writing
this
Linking Words
 to express my disappointment regarding the flat. It has been 6 months that I
am
Wrong verb form
have been
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 renting
this
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 apartment and the interior of the flat is amazing. I love the view of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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city life as it is
in
Change preposition
apply
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located in the
suburb
Fix the agreement mistake
suburbs
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 of
main
Change the article
the main
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 city.
Although
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 everything is perfect except the heating system which is giving the trouble. Sometimes, it does not automatically
changes
Correct subject-verb agreement
change
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 the temperature
according to
Linking Words
 the weather so I have to do it manually.
Therefore
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, it is disturbing my sleep and causing sleep disorder which is affecting my health. As I know, you just repaired the apartment and again it needs repair. It can be fixed if you will appoint an
electricion
Correct your spelling
electrician
 from reputed
companies
Fix the agreement mistake
company
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 who knows well about the issue. I would like you to provide me
a
Add the preposition
with a
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portable and durable fan that I can utilize for
sometime
Replace the word
some time
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untill
Correct your spelling
until
 the heating system
get
Change the verb form
gets
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 fixed. I hope you will understand my situation and solve
this
Linking Words
 problem as soon
possible
Change preposition
as possible
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. Yours faithfully, Harmeet Kaur

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task achievement
Ensure the reasons for joining the club are articulated clearly at the beginning of the letter. This will provide context and strengthen the task response.
coherence cohesion
Group similar ideas into paragraphs to enhance clarity and flow. For example, devote one paragraph to why you joined the club and another to the problems encountered.
suitable writing tone
The tone of the letter is polite and formal, which is suitable for addressing a club manager.
logical structure
The logical structure of the letter is generally easy to follow, which aids the reader in understanding the main points.
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