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Writing Samples /
Band 3.5

In the future nobody willbuy printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying.

#future #nobody #willbuy #newspapers #books
Advanced digital technology has shocking numbers
how
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on how
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 people consume information. Increasingly, humans prefer reading newspapers, books and magazines on online
platforms
 rather than in printed form. I totally agree, that in the future individuals, who are reading online, are going to grow
due to
 its convenience and
environmentally
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environmental
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 friendliness.
Firstly
, the convenience of online
platforms
are
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is
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unprecidented
Correct your spelling
unprecedented
. Modern devices can include
entire
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an entire
the entire
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 library and
allows
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allow
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 to people carry them in their
pocket
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pockets
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.
For example
, citizens are
waiting
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waiting for
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 a bus at the bus stop. Meanwhile, they will be able to use devices and start reading.
Secondly
, the ecofriendliness of online
platforms
are
Change the verb form
is
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 unparalleled. Producing printed items,
increasing
Wrong verb form
increases
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usage
Correct article usage
the usage
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 of the carbon footprint , which needs
for
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apply
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ink.
Moreover
, printing papers
are lead
Wrong verb form
leads
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 to destroying forests, which in their way
influnce
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influences
 to the
envitonment
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environment
.
As a
result
Add a comma
result,
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 lots of
hectars
Correct your spelling
hectares
 of wood are
reforestraited
Correct your spelling
reforested
. For that reason, many environmental organizations advocate for digital solutions to minimize ecological damage. In conclusion,
Correct article usage
the
show examples
preference
foe
Correct your spelling
for
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 reading on online
platforms
 will likely persist and grow. The convenience, ecological benefits and technological advancements of digital reading it the best alternative to printed materials.
Therefore
,
this
 is reasonable to expect the traditional printing industry to continue its decline as more people choose the digital revolution.
Submitted by akzharkynzhamal on

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Grammar
Ensure grammatical correctness and reduce typos for better readability (e.g., 'how' should be 'how', 'unprecidented' should be 'unprecedented').
Task Response
Add more specific examples to support your main points for a higher impact (e.g., name specific environmental organizations or technologies).
Coherence
Work on sentence variety and complexity to make your argument more compelling.
Task Response
You have clearly stated your position and supported it logically.
Structure
The introduction and conclusion effectively frame your argument.
Organization
The essay is well-organized into distinct paragraphs, each focusing on a different aspect of the argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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