Some people say that physical education classes are an important part of a child's education. Others believe that it is more important to focus on academics during school time. Discuss both views, and give your opinion.
Some individuals believe physical studying in classrooms is beneficial to children's education.
Nevertheless
,it is argued that focusing on academic lessons
during the period of learning time might be more crucial. In my opinion, both aspects are advantageous for students
' schooling in tandem as those are a great combination of studying effectiveness.
Firstly
, educational lessons
are somewhat important in general. As we know, there are many effective categories of learning methods excluding only attending physical classes
. For example
, remote studying through well-known online platforms ,such
as Zoom and Google Meet, has become a more acceptable and productive way these days after the COVID-19 epidemic,which significantly resulted in the alteration of people's lifestyles including learning methods. From my experience,it does not matter which options of learning the students
select but it is important how well students
can pay attention to those lessons
. For instance
, I am a person who prefers studying at home via online channels because I can pay my full attention to the content. After that, I realised that the effectiveness of online and physical classes
with a focus on the lessons
equally hardly varies in the results of education.
On the other hand
, focusing on the educational lessons
might be prioritized and then
followed by the types of classes
,namely physical classes
or online classes
. However
, I personally think that the alternative of learning categories is still crucial as the second priority,particularly in some groups of students
who can absolutely focus on the real lessons
and might not be distracted by any surrounding environment. Conversely
,some people who might be distracted easily by their surroundings may prefer physical classes
because they considerably demand a supportive atmosphere to encourage their studying period.
To conclude
, I believe that focusing on the academic lessons
is the first priority followed by the types of learning methods as a second. However
, being in a great environment supporting the schooling time like in a physical classroom might be advantageous for some students
as well.Submitted by phanphetpor on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure paragraphing is clearer, with distinct topics for each paragraph. This will improve the structure and flow of the essay.
coherence cohesion
Some ideas are repeated, try to avoid redundancy and maintain a balanced discussion between both views.
task achievement
To enhance clarity, make sure there is a clear explanation of how arguments support your viewpoint. This will reinforce a stronger task achievement.
overall
Proofread for minor grammatical and punctuation mistakes for a more polished academic tone.
coherence cohesion
A clear introduction and conclusion are provided, helping to frame the essay.
task achievement
The essay presents relevant specific examples to support the arguments, especially with reference to online learning.
task achievement
Both views are discussed, which shows an understanding of the task requirements.