Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion？

#people #music #cultures #ages #opinion？

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Many people believe that despite our differences,

music

is one of the best methods to connect individuals with each other. I totally agree with that as

music

has been used to express feelings and to represent the nations in some circumstances when you are not allowed to say what you want. First and foremost, folks reveal what is inside them through

music

, and say what they can not say in their own language.

Music

is a language that everyone will understand, even if they speak another language.

For example

, some lovers use

music

to show their love without saying a word.

Hence

music

is a privilege for us to communicate with others, as

music

helps you to know

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

people who share the same interests in life as you.

Secondly

music

could be used as a voice of the societies when the countries are experiencing hard situations. It has been noticed that when people are afraid to complain about their government, they use

music

as an indirect way to send their messages.

For instance

, in the world wars, many musicians said by their

music

that they

Wrong verb form

did

show examples

not agree with the war.

Furthermore

music

was used to emphasize the good connections between some states, as all the world will know that if it is through

music

. In conclusion,

although

we might not have the same ideas or beliefs and we may not agree with each other, yet when it comes to

music

we enjoy it together as all of us understand what it says.

Submitted by okalqusay on Tue Aug 13 2024

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task achievement

Consider expanding on your supporting points with more specific examples and detailed explanations. This can help to make your arguments more compelling.

coherence cohesion

Make sure your ideas are fully developed and clearly organized. This can improve coherence and make your essay easier to follow.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps to structure your ideas effectively.

task achievement

You provided relevant ideas around how music can connect people from different cultures and ages, which effectively addresses the task.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

254 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

universal appeal
cultural exchange
emotional connection
multigenerational
traditional music
modern genres
social cohesion
global audience
therapeutic effects
inclusive environments
shared experiences
musical diversity
cross-cultural understanding
artistic expression
collective identity

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Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion？

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types of relationships people make? Is this a positive or negative development?

Having more money and less free time is better than earning less money and having more free time. Some people think that high salary is important when choosing a company to work for, while other think that good working atmosphere is more important, Discuss both views and state your opinion.

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Social media is becoming increasingly popular amongst all age group. However, sharing personal information on social media websites does have risks. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

With increasing popularity of online learning, some people believe that traditional classroom education will become obsolete. Do you agree? Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of both online and traditional learning methods.