Some people claim that public museums and art galleries will not be needed because people can see historical objects and works of art by using a computer and the Internet. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#people #museums #art #galleries #objects #works #computer #internet

Nowadays, everything

could

Wrong verb form

can

show examples

be represented on the internet, even more items from the past. It can influence people to think that

places

which show the earlier

objects

such

as museums and

art

galleries are not necessary. I strongly disagree with

this

paradigm, and in the following paragraphs, I shall elucidate my perspective.

To begin

with, galleries and museums are not just

places

which keep items which are related

with

Change preposition

show examples

the past story. Even more, they serve as a hub of civilization knowledge, specifically.

Consequently

, when people visit those buildings, they

could

Wrong verb form

can

show examples

understand comprehensively

about

Change preposition

apply

show examples

civilization conditions

such

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

economy,

social

Replace the word

society

show examples

, politics, etc. which are contained by the

artifacts

Change the spelling

artefacts

show examples

, something which could not be done effectively on the internet.

For example

, when I visited the National Museum of Indonesia, I did not just absorb

about

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

Indonesian history,

however

, social,

economy

Replace the word

economic

show examples

, and

culture

Replace the word

cultural

show examples

could be understood

Change preposition

show examples

the same time.

Furthermore

, by displaying the

objects

, visitors could measure and have real experience from the displayed historical features.

This

condition could not be achieved by someone if he just reads on the webpage about historical-related items

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and

art works

Correct your spelling

artworks

show examples

As a consequence

, museum and

art

galleries

Change the noun form

gallery

show examples

enthusiasts may have

special

Add an article

a special

show examples

memory and connection with their

showed

Wrong verb form

shown

show examples

features after they attend directly

the

Change preposition

to the

show examples

earlier constructions, something which can make them comprehend more about the

Change the adjective

previously

show examples

seen things.

For instance

, after seeing ancient pictures at the National Gallery, I

had

Verb problem

was

show examples

enthusiasm

Replace the word

enthusiastic

show examples

to learn more about them. To summarize,

places

which keep past things and

art

-related

objects

could not

Wrong verb form

cannot

show examples

be superseded by the internet to learn about history and

art

. By visiting those

places

, people would have

complex

Add an article

a complex

show examples

understanding

about

Change preposition

show examples

civilization

condition

Fix the agreement mistake

conditions

show examples

in the ancient era, and they may have

enthusiasm

Change the article

the enthusiasm

show examples

to learn more about

art

and historical

objects

Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on Tue Aug 13 2024

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
26Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

294 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

virtual tours
digital archives
art appreciation
cultural heritage
historical objects
curating artifacts
interactive exhibits
preservation
tangible experience
technological advancements
cultural institutions
accessibility
authenticity
immersive experience
civic engagement
cultural enrichment
educational outreach
visitor engagement

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Some people claim that public museums and art galleries will not be needed because people can see historical objects and works of art by using a computer and the Internet. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Many people find it difficult to speak in front of and to present to anaudience. It is believed that this skill should be taught in school. Why is this important? To what extent do you agree or disagree with it?

In some countries, an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is, therefore, necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. Do you agree or disagree?

Motorways help people travel quickly and cover long distances but they also cause problems. What are the problems of motorway and what solutions are there?

In many countries children engage in some kind of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong, while others consider it as valuable experience, important for learning and taking responsibilty. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Nowadays, many people choose to be self-employed rather than work for a company or organization. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?