IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

In the furture, buses, cars and trucks will be driveless. The only people travelling inside will be passengers. Do you think the advantages driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?

#furture #buses #cars #trucks #driveless #people #passengers #driverless #vehicles
With technological advancements, the need for drivers in cars and
busses
Correct your spelling
buses
show examples
 will become less needed, as we
would
Wrong verb form
will
show examples
 be able to provide safe and reliable transport for anyone. In
this
 essay, I am going to list a few advantages and disadvantages of
this
 revolutionary idea. Looking
firstly
 at the positive effects of
autonomus
Correct your spelling
autonomous
vehicles
, without the need for a driver, companies would not have to devote time and money
into
Change preposition
to
show examples
 finding drivers and
therefore
, could prioritize
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
improving other aspects of public transport. The money
for
Add the comma(s)
, for
show examples
 example, could be used to enhance the quality of
busses
Correct your spelling
buses
show examples
 and trains,
as well as
 add more seating spaces and
accesible
Correct your spelling
accessible
 places for disabled people and the elderly.
Additionally
, with the use of specially programmed
softwares
Correct your spelling
software
 in
vehicles
, many accidents caused by human error could be eventually eliminated, resulting in making the roads much
more
Change the word
apply
show examples
safer for both pedestrians and passengers.
However
, there are many negative aspects to
this
 idea. Let's take bus drivers
for example
, with the use of fully automated
vehicles
, many would lose their jobs.
This
 could result in increased
unemplyment
Correct your spelling
unemployment
 rates
as well as
 the need for new job openings.
Moreover
,
this
 project would require a tremendous amount of funding and years of development to be completed,
therefore
lenghtening
Correct your spelling
lengthening
 the process and requiring resources
having
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
to be provided by ordinary citizens.
Lastly
, there are always potential risks of accidents happening
due to
 malfunctions or other technical difficulties. In conclusion, there are both advantages and disadvantages to implementing driverless
vehicles
 in everyday life, and certain criteria must be established before putting
this
 system to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
use.
Submitted by Sof on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Your essay would benefit from a more comprehensive response, including a more detailed exploration of both advantages and disadvantages. Try to give balanced points to both sides.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, work on ensuring that your ideas flow more smoothly between and within paragraphs. Use a variety of linking words and phrases to help with this transition.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which frames your argument well.
task response
The main points are generally well-supported and relevant to the topic.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • driverless vehicles
  • autonomous vehicles
  • human error
  • traffic flow
  • congestion
  • advanced algorithms
  • mobility solutions
  • economic impact
  • fuel consumption
  • carbon emissions
  • environmental sustainability
  • over-reliance on technology
  • initial investment
  • infrastructure
  • legislation adjustments
What to do next:
Look at other essays: