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Band 3

write about 4 reasons to learn a new language what is your opinion?

#language
In
this
 essay, we are gonna talk about "4 reasons to learn a new
language
".
Firstly
, I think
to learn
Change the verb form
learning
show examples
 a new
language
 is very useful and it can help you all the time. I mean, in your travels,
Change preposition
in another
show examples
another countries
Replace the adjective
another country
other countries
show examples
, your workplace and so on. 1.You can use a new
language
 which you
learnd
Correct your spelling
learned
learn
 in the town where you live.
For example
, you
moved
Wrong verb form
move
show examples
 to
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
another country and you have to
talk
Verb problem
speak
show examples
 the
language
 of the area you visited. 2.For the fun. Today
people
also
 learn a new
language
 for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fun.
May be
Correct your spelling
Maybe
show examples
, you don't need to
talk
Verb problem
speak
show examples
 another
language
 but you want to learn it. 3.For your education. Some
people
 want to study
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
abroad. They need it to take their needs, and get ahead in education. 4.For
the
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
 to be intelligent. Sometimes,
people
 ( for the
some
Correct your spelling
same
show examples
 reasons, or not) want to be intelligent in every sense. They may learn new languages to improve themselves.
This
 is necessary to keep up with our times.
Also
 when
people
 learn clearly
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
another
language
 they may
proud
Add a missing verb
be proud
show examples
 of themselves. It makes them clever
according to
 their minds. In our age,
tecnology
Correct your spelling
technology
 is developing and we have to go by the book.
Submitted by i.nureddinn on

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task achievement
Expand on your introduction to provide a clearer outline of the body points. The introduction should also state the purpose of the essay more explicitly.
coherence cohesion
Work on the grammatical accuracy and avoid repetition to make your sentences more coherent and flowing. This will also help in presenting your ideas more clearly.
coherence cohesion
Provide a more comprehensive conclusion that summarizes the reasons discussed and gives a final thought or recommendation related to the topic.
task achievement
The essay addresses the topic and provides four reasons to learn a new language, aligning well with the task.
supported main points
The points made are relevant and provide a good basis for the reasons stated. Each point is easy to understand.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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