Some companies prefer people to work in the office, while others facilitate their employees to work from home. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.
Some enterprises are fond of having staff working in the
office
, while
other employers assist subordinates to work from a distance. The idea of working from home appeals to me because it is not only economical for hirers but also
gives more flexibility for employees.
Firstly
, a key factor in my agreement with working remotely is that it saves the cost on many aspects for the employers. For example
, this
saves fixed costs such
as the rent for renting an office
, utility bills and some electronic equipment like printers or computers. Moreover
, it lowers personnel costs, especially for cleaners. In the long run, all these benefits save substantial expenditure for a company.
Secondly
, staff can utilize their time
more freely and enhance live quality. For instance
, they can save time
from
commuting to the Change preposition
by
office
in the morning, instead
, of doing workouts in the gym where nearby their house, refreshing the day, and having more vigor
for tasks.
Change the spelling
vigour
In addition
, if their child gets sick, they will be able to take care of the child while
working, meanwhile, sharing more time
with family. Furthermore
, with more time
and energy kept, this
allows people
to acquire other skills and knowledge so that people
might be capable of becoming a slashie. This
allows people
to have freedom of using time
and better financial status.
In contrast
, some individuals argue that working in the office
is more efficient. People
can talk in person, no need to wait for responses and errands can be done faster. However
, I believe this
concept will gradually fade away since generations are changing, these problems will all be conquered with technology someday.
In brief, I reckon telecommuting is the best way of working. It offers a benign cycle between employers and subordinates. Companies can distribute saved expenses as bonuses for employees, it can be an inducement to reduce turnover rate so that save time
and money on training newbies. Also
, staff can keep a healthier work and life balance with the flexibilities they have, these positive effects lead to better work performance and lifestyle, thus
, increasing the revenue for the company.Submitted by wendy190427 on
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Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly from one idea to the next. This can be done by using linking words or phrases and by making sure that each paragraph logically follows from the preceding one. This will help enhance the logical structure of your essay.
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Try to make your examples more specific and directly related to the point you are making. This will help reinforce your arguments and make them more compelling.
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Pay attention to certain word choices and clarity in expression. For example, 'slashie' might not be a widely recognized term. Using more universally understood terminology will help make your essay more accessible and clearer to a wider audience.
Coherence & Cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which effectively frame your argument. This is crucial in making your essay feel complete and well-structured.
Task Achievement
You provide balanced perspectives on both sides of the issue before stating your own opinion, which is a good approach to tackle 'discuss both views and give your opinion' type questions.
Task Achievement
Your examples are relevant and help to illustrate your points well, making your argument more convincing.
Coherence & Cohesion
The essay is well-organized overall, with each paragraph focusing on a single main idea. This makes your argument easy to follow and understand.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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