Although more and more people read the news on the Internet, newspaper will remain the most important source of news for the majority of people. Do you agree or disagree.

#people #news #internet #newspaper #source #majority

The diagrams illustrate the working adults' routine and how they spent their time doing different activities in two

years

, 1958 and 2008, in a certain country.

Change preposition

From

show examples

overall

perspective, it is readily apparent that working had the biggest shares out of all in both

years

Moreover

, going out with friends and family increased the most in these fifty

years

. The working people's priorities changed during

this

period.

To begin

with, working had the biggest share in both

years

; in 1958, it was 33% and

then

increased by nine

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

in the fifty

years

to reach 42% to show the most noticeable increase in the

work force's

Correct your spelling

workforce's

show examples

spent time out of all the activities. in ad

Submitted by amir.lajevardi84 on Wed Aug 14 2024

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task response

Ensure the essay is complete and addresses all components of the task. This essay lacks a conclusion and doesn't address all parts of the question thoroughly. For example, it could provide more detail on all the activities mentioned and compare the relative importance of newspapers and the internet more effectively.

coherence and cohesion

Improve the logical structure by ensuring each paragraph clearly supports the main argument. Currently, there is an abrupt end without summing up the main points or providing a final opinion on the subject.

task response

Provide specific examples and details to support your statements more effectively. For example, discuss why working had the biggest share and provide more context on changes in social activities like going out with friends and family.

introduction

The essay has a clear and relevant introduction, which provides a good starting point for the argument.

task achievement

The essay attempts to compare changes over time, which is crucial for this type of task. This is a strong attempt to respond to the task requirements.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

116 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Although more and more people read the news on the Internet, newspaper will remain the most important source of news for the majority of people. Do you agree or disagree.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In many countries governments are investing in new technology to deal with the public. Why this happening? Do you think this is an appropriate use of government money?

The world has many towns and cities constructed in previous centuries that were more suitable and livable for people in those time than they are now. What problems will this cause ? What can be done to solve these problems ?

Some people think that exercise is the key to health, while others feel that having a balanced diet is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

To learn effecrively, children need to eat a healthy meal at school. How true is this statement? Whose responsibility is it to provide food for school children?

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problem are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or an negative development?