Some people think competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believes that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

#people #competition #work #school #life

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A vast majority of

people

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think that engaging in a competitive

environment

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such

Linking Words

as the

workplace

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, educational centre, and in our everyday life is a good

practise

Correct your spelling

practice

show examples

while

Linking Words

others think being in

cooperative

Correct article usage

a cooperative

show examples

environment

Use synonyms

is better. In my opinion, I believe that a collaborative

environment

Use synonyms

breeds a positive

altitude

Correct your spelling

attitude

show examples

while

Linking Words

Use synonyms

competition

Add an article

the competition

show examples

promotes

setback

Fix the agreement mistake

setbacks

show examples

. On the one hand, many

people

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think that engaging in

competition

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way

Correct article usage

a way

show examples

to know who does the job better.

However

Linking Words

competition

Use synonyms

Change preposition

show examples

the

workplace

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can

folster

Correct your spelling

foster

bolster

many

setback

Change to a plural noun

setbacks

show examples

in terms of completing a task or project.

For example

Linking Words

researched

Replace the word

research

show examples

conducted by students in data analysis revealed that 80 per cent of

employee

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employees

show examples

lost

there

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their

show examples

job

Fix the agreement mistake

jobs

show examples

due to

Linking Words

the competitive nature

Change preposition

show examples

the

workplace

Use synonyms

because some of them wanted to please

thier

Correct your spelling

their

boss for a

higer

Correct your spelling

higher

reward.

Therefore

Linking Words

competition

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can

also

Linking Words

cause jealousy

Change preposition

show examples

the

workplace

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or in our daily

life

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lives

show examples

people

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should learn to put

competion

Correct your spelling

competition

aside to promote

better

Correct article usage

a better

show examples

evironment

Correct your spelling

environment

for growth.

On the other hand

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, team collaboration is one way to promote a productive

workplace

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. Many

people

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believe

this

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because

this

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can help build

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

creative development and

problem solving

Add a hyphen

problem-solving

show examples

by sharing ideas and

experience

Fix the agreement mistake

experiences

show examples

For instance

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, a group of students got a good grade in their subject, because every individual in the group

participarted

Correct your spelling

participated

and shared common ideas to achieve the

project

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project's

show examples

aim and objective.

Hence

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people

Use synonyms

should learn to cooperate to

folster

Correct your spelling

foster

bolster

a positive

altitude

Correct your spelling

attitude

show examples

. In conclusion, I believe that both arguments have their merits.

However

Linking Words

, cooperation at the

workplace

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can enhance

Remove the article

apply

show examples

global prosperity, productivity,

effieciency

Correct your spelling

efficiency

, and a positive

environment

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while

Linking Words

competition

Use synonyms

can cause major

setback

Fix the agreement mistake

setbacks

show examples

in getting

a tasks

Correct the article-noun agreement

tasks

a task

show examples

complete

Replace the word

completed

show examples

Submitted by igiedaniel07 on Thu Aug 15 2024

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task response

Ensure that your introduction clearly sets out the main points you plan to discuss in the essay. This will help create a roadmap for the reader.

coherence cohesion

Try to avoid small spelling and grammatical errors. While these were minor, they can hinder the reader's understanding. For example, 'folster' should be 'foster' and 'altitude' should be 'attitude'.

task response

Expand on your points with more detailed examples or statistics to better support your arguments. This will make your essay more persuasive and comprehensive.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a clear structure with paragraphs that discuss both views and a conclusion that presents your opinion.

task achievement

You provided relevant examples to support your arguments, which helps to clarify your points.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
33
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

270 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

innovation
productivity
excel
outperform
advancements
academic standards
work ethic
stress
anxiety
unhealthy rivalries
harmonious
supportive
collaborative learning
social skills
communication skills
sense of community
collective goals

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Some people think competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believes that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

In many developing nation, the rush to become industrialized has created major problems with air and water quality. What are the problems that this has brought about and offer some solutions to these problems?

In some countries young people are encourages to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.

some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Some people think certain old buildings are worth preserving more than the other ones.Which types of old buildings should be preserved？Do you think the advantages of preserving old buildings outweigh the disadvantages？

Some people say that what individuals do to protect cannot make difference, others say that individuals can protect environment. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.