IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3

The plan below show a harbour in 2000 and how it looks today

#plan #show #harbour
The diagram illustrates changes
at
Change preposition
in
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Porth
Correct article usage
the Porth
show examples
 Harbour
plan
 in 2000 and how
its
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
looking
Wrong verb form
looks
show examples
 now.
Overall
, some new developments were added and
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
 thing things were removed as per details from the
plan
. In 2000, Porth Harbour
comprises
Wrong verb form
comprised
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
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a castle located at the
south east
Correct your spelling
southeast
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 of the
plan
 which was disused, there was
also
 a private beach used by the hotel, and a lifeboat close to the cafes and shops.
In addition
, there were
also
 car
park
Fix the agreement mistake
parks
show examples
 and fishing boats at the
south
Correct your spelling
southwest
show examples
west
 corner of the
plan
.
Furthermore
, the
plan
also
 showed a marina with private yachts,
carpark
Correct article usage
a carpark
show examples
, and toilets at the
north
Correct your spelling
northwest
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west
 corner.
While
, at the northern side of the
plan
 contains a public beach, passenger and a dock. Today, some changes
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 been made
due to
 the renovation of the harbour. The
castel
Correct your spelling
castle
 which was disused has been replaced by a hotel,
while
 the
the
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
marina private yachts on the
north
Correct your spelling
northwest
show examples
west
 side
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 swapped to the
south
Correct your spelling
southwest
show examples
west
 corner and the fishing boats were moved to the
north
Add a hyphen
north-west
show examples
west
, there was
also
 an addition of cafes and shops near the lifeboat building.
Moreover
, the dock was
also
 expanded with new
boat
Fix the agreement mistake
boats
show examples
 added.
Submitted by igiedaniel07 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure there is a clear introduction and conclusion to frame your essay.
coherence cohesion
Use more linking words and cohesive devices to connect your ideas smoothly.
task achievement
Expand on your details with more specific examples to better illustrate the changes.
task achievement
You have successfully identified and described the key changes between the two time periods.
task achievement
Your essay covers all the significant changes in the harbour’s layout, which shows you have a good grasp of the visual information.
coherence cohesion
The structure of your essay follows a logical order, making it easy to follow the transitions and alterations.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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