The car is possibly the most convenient and popular way of getting from A to B. However, due to its impact on environment and the risk it poses to pedestrians and motorists, government should take urgent steps to reduce our dependency on this mode of transport. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some employers consider
job
candidates' social
skills
more important than their academic achievements.
This
statement raises a lot of questions and should be discussed whether those employers are correct or not. Social
skills
are needed in every single
job
people
apply to, but the demanded level depends on the profession. The more you interact with
people
at work, the more communication
skills
you are required to have.
Such
professions
Replace the word
professionals
show examples
like waiters, cashiers, sales assistants and many more,
those
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
socialize with clients the most, which proves the truthfulness of the
opinion
Fix the agreement mistake
opinions
show examples
some employers have. Academic
skills
show what exactly the person is able to do, whether is related to their career or not, it would still be a positive addition to their resumé.
People
should pay attention to the requirements of the occupation, so they can be confident that they are suitable for the wanted role. I can view the point of some managers
prefering
Correct your spelling
preferring
social
skills
over academic qualifications. Social
skills'
Change noun form
skills
show examples
level does depend on the
job
the person is doing. If I was one of the
people
picking candidates, I'd
also
be more curious about employees' socializing abilities.
People
applying for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
occupations related to interacting with strangers should have the
abilities
Fix the agreement mistake
ability
show examples
to keep professionalism during their shift to reassure the employer that they are perfect for the
job
. In
conslusion
Correct your spelling
conclusion
, I absolutely agree with managers' opinion about
job
applicants'
skills
,
people
should be screened for work requirements and they
also
should always have at least some knowledge about professional speech at work.
Submitted by dulskywork on

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introduction
While the essay does introduce the topic effectively, it could benefit from a stronger thesis statement that clearly outlines your stance. This would provide a clearer direction for the reader.
supported main points
The main points presented in the essay are relevant, but they need to be more deeply developed with specific examples and more detailed explanations to thoroughly support your arguments.
clear comprehensive ideas
The essay's ideas are clear, but at times they lack depth and precision. Aim to elaborate more on why social skills are essential and how they can outweigh academic qualifications in certain job settings.
introduction
The essay introduces the topic and context effectively, making it clear what will be discussed.
conclusion
Your conclusion succinctly sums up your views and reaffirms your stance, providing a sense of closure to the essay.
supported main points
You effectively highlight the importance of social skills in various professions and successfully relate it to the job market requirements.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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