In some countries, many more people are choosing to live alone nowadays​ ​than in the past. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In recent times, many people in some countries, are preferring living alone compared to the past. I personally believe it is a negative development, because living alone cannot provide security and
wellbeing
Correct your spelling
well-being
show examples
, and not
making
Verb problem
having
show examples
a family is not good for
society
's future. To start with, if a person lives alone, he is responsible for his own safety and
wellbeing
Correct your spelling
well-being
show examples
. He has to take care of himself without the help of others, and at the same time, work and survive. There are risks in
this
type of living, as there is no one to help
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
time
need
Change preposition
of need
show examples
.
For example
, if he gets sick, there is no one to look after him, and most importantly, if there is an emergency, there is even no one to call the ambulance. Being alone is
therefore
,
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
not safe for any person.
Moreover
, those who have decided to live alone, may not have the plan to make a family. If all people decide to live alone, there will be no new family and no children. Not making a family is detrimental
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
, because it ultimately hampers
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
human civilization.
For example
, in Japan, many people from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
urban areas are interested in leading their lives alone. There is no new family and
therefore
, the population of Japan is constantly decreasing. Living alone does not encourage making and family and it is not good for human
society
.
To conclude
, living alone is
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
beneficial for an individual and for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
. It is negative in all ways and it should not be promoted.
Submitted by rahman_rehana on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Your essay addresses the task adequately and presents a clear position. However, you need to elaborate more on your points and provide more specific examples to better illustrate your ideas.
coherence and cohesion
While your essay is generally well-organized, there are some areas where clarity can be improved. Make sure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence, and consider using more cohesive devices to link your ideas together.
task response
You have taken a clear stance on the issue and supported your main points with relevant arguments.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a logical structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which helps in maintaining coherence.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: