Today, the high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of advertising and not the real needs of the society in which they are sold . To what extent do you agree or disagree ? Give reason for your answer and include,any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience
When the
first
astronaut put his step
on the Moon
, he said that it can
be considered Wrong verb form
could
as
a huge Change preposition
apply
step
for humanity. However
, some individuals state that it does not have any impact on our daily life
, so it is not that essential to travel to the Fix the agreement mistake
lives
Moon
. I strongly disagree with this
opinion, since this
is an egocentric view that has not been fully analyzed.
In conclusion, I completely disagree that people
should underestimate the value of the first
human step
on the moon
,
since it has been the Remove the comma
apply
first
chain of sequential inventions and motivating
source for many Correct article usage
a motivating
people
to open the doors of great
Correct article usage
a great
future
.
Besides
, having inspired an increasing number of children is another reason that makes it a big salam step
. Namely, despite their daily challenges, our youngsters are more hopeful and determined about their future
. It is a motivating factor to serve for having
Change preposition
to have
great
and sustainable Correct article usage
a great
future
in many fields, albeit to make a great amount of money for themselves. In the USA, for instance
, it is observed that students are inclined to be more motivated to make a difference in their field such
as computer science and medicine, which will lead to have
more breakthroughs to shape Unnecessary verb
apply
great
Correct article usage
a great
future
for all humanity.
In conclusion, I completely disagree that people
should underestimate the value of the first
human step
on the moon
,
since it has been the Remove the comma
apply
first
chain of sequential inventions and motivating
source for many Correct article usage
a motivating
people
to open the doors of great
Correct article usage
a great
future
.Submitted by i.nureddinn on
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introduction
The introduction does a good job in stating the thesis, but it should give a brief overview of the main points to be discussed. Revise the introduction to provide a clear roadmap for the essay.
coherence and cohesion
Work on paragraph structure by ensuring each paragraph has a clear topic sentence, supporting sentences, and a concluding sentence. This will improve the logical flow and coherence of your essay.
task achievement
Include more specific examples to support your points. Real-world examples and data can make your arguments more convincing.
conclusion
Watch for repetition, particularly in the conclusion, where the same sentence is repeated. Refine your conclusion to summarize the key points made in the essay without redundancy.
task achievement
The essay provides a clear position on the topic, demonstrating strong personal engagement and argumentation skills.
coherence and cohesion
There is an evident structure with an introduction and conclusion present.
language use
The use of phrases like 'egocentric view' and 'increasing number of children' shows a good range of vocabulary and expression.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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