IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

You have just started a course in a college which has no sports facilities of its own. Write a letter to manager of the nearest private sports club. In your letter • introduce yourself • say why you are interested in this sports club • ask some questions about the club e.g. facilities, members, costs

#course #college #sports #facilities #manager #club #questions #e #g #members #costs
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Dear Sir or Madam, I am Laziza, a student of your college. I am writing to ask for information about membership in the Leo Sports
club
Capitalize word
Club
show examples
. As you know, not any
spots
Correct your spelling
sports
show examples
 facilities in our college. Indeed our students
wants
Change the verb form
want
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 to take part in the Leo Sports
club
. I
have known
Wrong verb form
know
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 that
this
club
 is well-known among us. We can take
part-time
Add an article
the part-time
a part-time
show examples
 course if you
let
Verb problem
want
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. As to our main computer course, we can manage both of them. I am
also
 interested to know about Leo Sports
club's
Capitalize word
Club's
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 facilities, members and costs. What do you think about the costs? Are there
students
Change the noun form
student
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 discounts? Can you give us information about the
club
? I am expecting a comprehensive reply from you about the details of the activities and other information I requested. I look forward to hearing from you soon.
Correct the word
Yours
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Your
Correct your spelling
Yours
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 faithfully, Laziza.
Submitted by omondavlat91 on

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task achievement
While the letter covers all the necessary points, try adding more specific details or examples to make your request clearer and more persuasive.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph focuses on a single idea to improve readability. Group related information together.
coherence cohesion
Consider rephrasing for more natural-sounding expressions, such as 'I would like to know more about the sports club's facilities, costs, and membership options.'
greeting and closing
You have included a proper greeting and closing, which is essential for formal letters.
suitable writing tone
The tone of your letter is polite and suitable for a formal request.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 150 words in writing task 1. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long letter will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 160 to 190 words in writing task 1. This will ensure a concise letter and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 20 minutes to write the letter and you need around 5 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long letter in 15 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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