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Band 6.5

The graph below shows in percentage terms the changing patterns of domestic access to modern technology in homes in the UK

The graph below shows in percentage terms the changing patterns of domestic access to modern technology in homes in the UK
#percentage #terms #patterns #access #technology #homes #uk
The given line graph shows us, in
percentage
, how changed patterns of domestic access to modern technology, in homes in the United Kingdom, in a period from 1996 to 2003. Process the graph , we are comparing 4 gizmos and as we can clearly see the
CD
player
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 the biggest
percentage
, over 80
then
 others. As can be seen in the graph, in 1996 -1997
Correct article usage
the
show examples
mobile
phone
Fix the agreement mistake
phones
show examples
 in the United Kingdom
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 about a little bit lower 20
percentage
Replace the word
per cent
show examples
.
While
CD
player
 was almost
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
three times larger, about 60
percentage
Replace the word
per cent
show examples
. Over the period 1996 to 2003
Correct your spelling
CD
show examples
Cd
Fix the agreement mistake
players
show examples
player
rise
Wrong verb form
rose
show examples
 steadily, at the same time
mobile
Correct article usage
the mobile
show examples
phone
Fix the agreement mistake
phones
show examples
fluctuated slightly, sometimes livelier off,
although
 the trend was upward. It could
be notices
Change the verb form
be noticed
show examples
 that home
computes
Correct your spelling
computers
show examples
 have
similar
Correct article usage
a similar
show examples
 trend with
CD
player
Fix the agreement mistake
players
show examples
,
although
 it
happening
Wrong verb form
happens
show examples
 about 25 - 60
percentage
Replace the word
per cent
show examples
.
The
Change preposition
In the
show examples
 period between 1998 and 2003 Internet access suddenly appeared and climbed sharply.
Submitted by dnm.best on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "although".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 75%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage, cd, player with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 3 times.
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