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Band 2.5

Scientists believe that computers will become more intelligent than human beings. Some people find it is a positive trend while others think it is a negative development. Discuss both points and give your own opinion.

#scientists #computers #beings #people #trend #development #points
Nowadays, technology has brought about significant changes in various aspects of our lives, both positive and negative. Some scientists think that computers will take over and humans are no longer occupied.
While
 many people believe that
this
 is a positive trend; others,
on the other hand
, argue against
such
 a suggestion.
This
 essay will discuss the opposing ideas and will draw my own perspective. On the one hand, there are many beneficial trends regarding computers.
Firstly
, it will improve efficiency and productivity. Technology automates the tasks and processes for both individuals and businessmen, enabling them to boost their productivity in less time.
Secondly
, the Internet has a vast amount of information readily available
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 people.
This
 accessibility will reduce employability which will raise
However
,
although
 there are numerous benefits of having computers. Excessive use of technology may lead to isolation and loneliness.
This
 means many
Submitted by noranaldhafiri on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and smooth transition between ideas to improve logical structure.
coherence cohesion
Include a stronger conclusion that summarizes the main points and provides a clear final perspective.
task achievement
Support the main ideas with specific, relevant examples and explanations.
task achievement
Expand on the cons of computers taking over human jobs to have a more balanced argument.
coherence cohesion
The introduction clearly states the problem and that the essay will discuss both views.
task achievement
Employs appropriate language and a range of vocabulary.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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