Some people say free time activities for children should be organized by parents. Others say that children should be free to choose what they do in their free time. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
These days, lifestyles have been changing from the past
time
and children
's free time
is an important thing for their parents
, so a group of people believe it is necessary that parents
make a plan for their children
's lasuir time
while
other ones think that young generations ought to make a schedule for their time
. I subscribe to the first idea; moreover
, in my opinion, this
has several benefits that can overshadow the drawbacks inasmuch as the parents
have more experience than their children
.
On the one hand, if parents
make a decision for their children
's spare time
, they will be more success owing to the fact
that they have a lot of experience that can help children
to improve their abilities better than the prior time
. To illustrate, when my mother tells me to do things
such
as go to sports class, English class, and so forth, most of the time
these things
help me to show my best talents in my not only study but also
work; nevertheless
, many time
these planes waste my time
due to
the fact
that these methods are old.
On the other hand
, if children
choose their free time
categories, they might falt because they do not know what it is good for them and what things
have a lot of negative points; furthermore
, The Internet and other social media cannot help them really good on account of the fact
that they show the best view of things
, not their issues.
To conclude
, parents
have various matters in their plan; although
, it is crucial that their thinks are better than younger people in view of the fact
that they know everything and the aspects of them; additionally
, they can find the perfect things
better than their children
.Submitted by maryamkazemi968 on
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coherence cohesion
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general
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task achievement
The essay touches on both sides of the argument, which demonstrates a balanced approach to the topic.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present making the structure clearer.
task achievement
There are some relevant examples to support the main points, reflecting an effort to substantiate the argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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