IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The table shows data about underground railway systems in six major cities with the date they opened, kilometers of route, and passenger numbers per year in millions. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The graph given illustrates data on railway systems in six major cities with the date they opened. The graph contains recent years.
Overall
Linking Words
, the number of
cases
Use synonyms
 in Tokyo was more than the figures for
cases
Use synonyms
 in Kyoto.
According to
Linking Words
 the graph, it is noticeable that there is a development.
To begin
Linking Words
, first of all, it can be clearly seen that railway systems in six major cities with the date they opened. The initial one to consider is that In 1927, the figures for
cases
Use synonyms
 increased significantly approximately to 1928 passengers per year in Tokyo.
Moreover
Linking Words
, by 1981, there was a slow drop to 45.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the number of
cases
Use synonyms
 fell slightly around to 50 passengers per year in Los Angeles.
Therefore
Linking Words
, In 1900, there was a remarkable jump to 1191 in Paris. Regarding the
obtain
Wrong verb form
obtained
show examples
 show, it is remarkable that there is a leap. There was an upward trend in Tokyo
while
Linking Words
 there was a downward trend in Kyoto . In reference to the represented figures, it is significant that there is an achievement.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words cases with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "data" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "significantly" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • underground railways
  • kilometers of route
  • passenger numbers
  • annually
  • compare and contrast
  • mega-cities
  • public transportation infrastructure
  • extensive network
  • rapid transit
  • capacity
  • commuter volume
  • inauguration date
  • modernization
  • vintage
  • urban development
What to do next:
Look at other essays: