Some people believe in studying whatever they like whereas others think about studying what is needed for the future. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement
In university,
students
are liable for their studies and their choices. Therefore
, it is viable or essential for them to choose their career
path
carefully. Moreover
, there is a belief which advises those undergraduates to go for whichever suits their own preference. Yet, others restate that the importance of the future career
will dictate the opportunity to be successful, leading to taking more mainstream courses such
as science and technology. In this
writing, the freedom
of study is explored and discussed.
There is no doubt that studying is the straight-forward
Correct your spelling
straightforward
path
to pursue a successful career
. Therefore
, motivation and attitude toward learning are important factors in order for students
to do well in lectures and get a
good Correct article usage
apply
grade
. They need to have deep Fix the agreement mistake
grades
aspiration
in topics or courses to encourage themselves to research and complete their tasks satisfactorily. The excitement is shown by what undergraduates are actually passionate about. The more they love the subjects, the more time they will spend. Fix the agreement mistake
aspirations
For instance
, many scientists and technologists are willing to devote most of their time to conduct
more research since they are fascinated Wrong verb form
conducting
in
discovering new things. Change preposition
by
Furthermore
, the question is raised as whether
Change preposition
to whether
students
could thrive in their career
path
in the long run or not if they studied what parents or the majority had believed was necessary for their future. In the end, passion is the key factor in achieving the
Correct article usage
apply
long term
success.
Add a hyphen
long-term
Then
, it comes down to responsibility and happiness. The freedom
of choice promotes the self-liability of one. Students
must love their subjects for them to spend more time studying and practising. They are passionate about their choice and they could have planned out the regulation to finish the course. Meanwhile, the accomplishment of what they love to do will bring the greatest content of all. It is not only what they could have learned in class but also
independence on the choice of others leads to self-acknowledgement of responsibility and independence. In fact, rights and duties are regulated by freedom
. It means one can do whatever they want but in the end, the results are what they are responsible for.
In summary, freedom
of studying can make students
focus more on the courses, bring success to their future careers and create a sense of self-responsibility. While
this
statement may have some drawbacks, yet
having problems could promote a better Correct word choice
apply
career
path
and the happiness to follow it until the end.Submitted by vinu052t on
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task achievement
Try to provide more specific examples to strengthen your arguments. For instance, mention specific fields of study beyond just 'science and technology.'
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and maintains focus on a single idea. This will help in maintaining a logical flow throughout the essay.
coherence cohesion
While your introduction and conclusion are strong, they could be slightly more engaging. Try to start with a hook or an interesting fact and conclude with a more definitive statement.
task achievement
Your essay provides a complete response to the task and covers both perspectives effectively.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well-structured, clearly presenting and summarizing your main points.
task achievement
You successfully highlight the importance of passion and responsibility in career choice, making your main ideas clear and comprehensive.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?