IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with prediction for 2030 and 2040 Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with prediction for 2030 and 2040 Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.
#information #percentage #population #four #asian #countries #cities #prediction #summarise #features #comparisons
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The line graph illustrates
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 the resident percentage in
Use synonyms
Philippines
Correct article usage
the Philippines
show examples
, Malaysia,
Thailand
Use synonyms
, and Indonesia from 1970 to 2020 and
following
Correct article usage
the following
show examples
 years from 2030 to 2040 is the expected percentage of
total
Add an article
the total
show examples
 population.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is evident from the graph that the trend from all 4 countries is rising and expecting Malaysia to be highest populated country among the rest.
Firstly
Linking Words
, Malaysia and Indonesia never saw a dip in the population. By starting approximately at 30% and 12% in 1970 and
then
Linking Words
 slight increase between 1980 to 2000. Following years until
2020
Add a comma
2020,
show examples
this
Linking Words
 increase was high. Which
later
Add a missing verb
is later
show examples
 expected to be
substantial
Correct article usage
a substantial
show examples
 rise by reaching almost 81% and 60%
from
Change preposition
between
show examples
 2030 and 2040.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
Use synonyms
Philippines
Correct article usage
the Philippines
show examples
 and
Thailand
Use synonyms
 saw
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
slow progress in the growth. Initiated with nearly 31% and 18% in 1970. For
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 next two
decades
Add a comma
decades,
show examples
 both recorded moderated increases reaching almost 50% and 30%. Later years from 2000 to 2020
Philippines
Use synonyms
 experienced
slight
Add an article
a slight
show examples
 dip in the middle and remained almost unchanged till 2020 marking around 40% and
Thailand
Use synonyms
 was stable throughout the duration by maintaining 30%
nearly
Rephrase
apply
show examples
. But the predictions were seen increasing from 2030 to 2040 where
both
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
reaching almost 60% in
Use synonyms
Philippines
Correct article usage
the Philippines
show examples
 and 45% in
Thailand
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by nlchiranth11 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Replace the words philippines, thailand with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "dip" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "slight" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: