Mrs Barrett, an English speaking woman who lives in your town, has advertised for someone to help her home for a few hours a day next summer. Write a letter to Mrs Barrett. In your letter, suggest how you could help her in her home, say why you would like to do this work and explain when you will and will be available

Hello Msr. Barrett, My name is Nadezhda. I saw your notice that you need to help with your home.
I’m
writing to you to get my help and to tell you that I have a big wish to
work
for you.
I’m
40 years old and I can do any housework.
I’m
very responsible and
hardwoking
Correct your spelling
hardworking
. I can clean floors and windows,
wash
Correct word choice
and wash
show examples
dishes and clothes. I know how to design rooms or gardens. I can renovate an apartment and paint walls.
Furthermore
, I
like
Add the particle
like to
show examples
go for a walk with pets and care for them if you have one.
I’m
studying English and I need
Fix the infinitive
to practice
show examples
practice
Correct your spelling
practise
show examples
speaking with some
English speaking
Add a hyphen
English-speaking
show examples
person. I will be very happy to
work
in your home and have a talk with you. You won’t be able to pay me but only speak with me with a
cap
Correct your spelling
cup
show examples
of tea.
I’m
a freelancer and have enough free time for your
work
. I prefer to
work
in the morning and will be able to spend 4 hours every weekday. I should start when it will be convenient for you. I await your answer. If you need more information you can call me at any time. Sincerely, Nadezhda.
Submitted by aboykova13 on

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coherence cohesion
The logical structure of your letter is clear, but some sentences need minor grammatical adjustments to enhance clarity. For instance, 'you need to help with your home' could be clearer if rephrased as 'you need help with your home'.
coherence cohesion
Try to use varied sentence structures to keep the reader engaged. For example, instead of listing tasks in a long sentence, consider breaking it into shorter sentences or using bullet points for clarity.
task achievement
Consider rephrasing 'I should start when it will be convenient for you' to 'I can start whenever it is convenient for you' for smoother language flow.
coherence cohesion
Your greeting and closing are polite and appropriately formal, which is ideal for this type of letter.
coherence cohesion
The letter is well-organized with each paragraph discussing a single idea, which makes it easy to read.
task achievement
You have provided comprehensive details about your skills and availability, effectively addressing the task requirements.
task achievement
Your writing tone is appropriate for the context, demonstrating both enthusiasm and professionalism.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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