You have recently applied for a course at a college and have been accepted. However, you cannot join the course due to some reasons. Write a letter to the principal of the college. In your letter, • which course you have applied for • why you cannot join the course • ask about the possibility of the course in the future
Dear Sir or Madam
I am writing to inquire about the
course
. I will study at a collage
. I am educated.
I give document Correct your spelling
college
english
Change the capitalization
English
course
at a collage
. Then
I will enter the college . I was learning a lot for exam
. I will Correct article usage
the exam
moving
to another city soon. I will Change the verb form
move
be moving
do
not study. I read a book day and night. I was eagerly waiting for the exam answer. I will major in economics at a College.
Again, I do not have any money right now for Unnecessary verb
apply
collage
. My brother Correct your spelling
college
work
in KFC. My brother Change the verb form
works
earn
money in KFC. He Change the verb form
earns
get
six hundred Change the verb form
gets
dollar
Change to a plural noun
dollars
for
month. But it is not enough. I will move Change preposition
per
another
city. Change preposition
to another
Then
I will work more for myself. The cost of the course
is very expensive. This
is the reason.
What is the benefit of the course
in the future.
After reading, I had a lot of plans. But I will Change the punctuation
?
do
not study Unnecessary verb
apply
his
Change preposition
at his
collage
.
I look forward to hearing you!
Correct your spelling
college
Your
faithfully
John JacobCorrect the word
Yours
Submitted by omondavlat91 on
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coherence cohesion
Provide clearer and more structured paragraphs. Each paragraph should cover a single main idea and be logically ordered.
coherence cohesion
Ensure the reasons for not being able to join the course are clearly explained. For example, you mentioned moving city and financial reasons, but the letter's flow makes it hard to follow.
task achievement
Use formal language and tone to address the principal. Avoid using informal phrases like 'I am educated' and specify the course name clearly at the beginning.
coherence cohesion
The greeting and closing are appropriate for a formal letter, showing awareness of the correct style.
task achievement
You have included all required details: the course you applied for, reasons for not joining, and inquiries about future possibilities.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite