As the internet becomes more popular, newspapers are becoming a thing of the past. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Newspapers
turn into an outdated sources
of Correct the article-noun agreement
an outdated source
outdated sources
information
, in
the opposite the Change preposition
on
internet
comes to be
significantly fashionable. I agree with Wrong verb form
has become
this
claim because electronic news
are
more Change the verb form
is
up to date
compared toAdd a hyphen
up-to-date
the
printedCorrect article usage
apply
ones
. Correct your spelling
news
Furthermore
, access to the web is cheaper and easier than to the press
.
Information
on the internet
is updated every second, in contrast
, the newspapers
need to be written by journalists, then
printed and delivered to the shops. Due to
that, electronic news
would be
always fresher than paperWrong verb form
is
ones
andCorrect your spelling
news
Add a missing verb
is
for instance
, on the internet
the information
would appear in the same hour, so people could know about the expected fixing time. In the same case, the news
about the same problem would be printed in the newspapers
, probably after the problem was solved.
To make the press
available to the buyers,
requires a lot of supplies and workers. Remove the comma
apply
This
reason makes newspapers
not as cheap as internet
sources. Electronically delivered news
does not need paper and inkAdd the comma(s)
,
for example
, fewer supplies means a cheaper final price for shoppers. Also
, internet
news
requires the only journalists to occur, in the opposite press
is made by journalists, printers, and couriers and it needs to be sold by someone. More employees make products higher in price for customers.
To conclude
, newspapers
are a thing of the past and the internet
is the future of the news
. The press
is not as up to date
as the web Add a hyphen
up-to-date
information
, in addition, the price is also
higher.Submitted by a.swietochowska11 on
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task achievement
Ensure that each argument is fully developed with clear explanations and examples. For instance, add more details on why internet news is more accessible and affordable compared to newspapers.
task achievement
Pay attention to grammatical accuracy and vocabulary usage. For example, use 'sources' instead of 'sourses' and 'comes' instead of 'comes'. Additionally, correct the article usage such as 'makes newspapers not as cheap' should be 'makes newspapers more expensive'.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical flow of ideas. Ensure that there is a clear link between each sentence and paragraph. For example, ensure smoother transitions between sentences and paragraphs to enhance readability.
coherence cohesion
Refine the structure by clearly separating the introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Ensure each section is clearly defined and concise.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear standpoint on the topic and gives relevant supporting points for the argument. It communicates the main idea effectively.
coherence cohesion
There is a clear introduction and conclusion, making it easy for the reader to understand the overall argument.
task achievement
The use of practical examples, such as alerts about water supply failures, helps in illustrating the points more concretely.