IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The diagram shows how rainwater is collected for the use of drinking water in an Australian town.

The diagram shows how rainwater is collected for the use of drinking water in an Australian town.
The given diagram illustrates the process of recycling
rainwater
Use synonyms
 to utilise in
homes
Correct article usage
the homes
show examples
 of a particular Australian town.
Overall
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 process involves mechanical and automatic stages, beginning with collecting
rainwater
Use synonyms
 and culminating in preparing drinking
water
Use synonyms
 to utilise.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, there is a complex
water
Use synonyms
 system which connects each house with tubes in the town.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
rainwater
Use synonyms
 drops onto the roof of buildings and goes to a
water
Use synonyms
 filter machine through tube lines. Inside
this
Linking Words
 mechanism, rain is cleaned of harmful things,
such
Linking Words
 as microplastics,
mircobes
Correct your spelling
microbes
 and others, and
consequently
Linking Words
 is sent to a big storage. The storage can keep
amount
Correct article usage
an amount
show examples
 of
rainwater
Use synonyms
 for a long time.
The next step is
Linking Words
water
Use synonyms
 treatment, which happens in a huge container. In
this
Linking Words
 stage, different chemicals are added to clean
water
Use synonyms
 to improve its quality. After that,
water
Use synonyms
 is pushed through special tubes to every house in
this
Linking Words
 place.
Finally
Linking Words
, recycled and cleaned
water
Use synonyms
 is ready to use for dwellers.

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words rainwater, water with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • rainwater harvesting
  • rooftops
  • drains and gutters
  • underground storage tanks
  • water treatment plant
  • purification
  • filtration
  • chemical treatment
  • impurities
  • microorganisms
  • distribution system
  • potable water
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