Childhood obesity is a serious problem in many countries. What are the causes of this and how can the problem be managed?

Our changing lifestyles have had a negative impact on our health. Today, many
children
are suffering from chronic
obesity
as a result
. In
this
essay, I would like to highlight the potential
causes
and
also
suggest some
ways
on
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apply
show examples
how to tackle
this
issue. There are many
causes
behind
this
but among them, poor diet and lack of exercise
seems
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seem
show examples
to be the key drivers of the disease. A move to convenience into
food
that
are
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is
show examples
rich in fat and sugar but low in fibre makes them more prone to be obese. Our bodies can not process
these
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this food
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food
efficiently,
as a
result
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result,
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the body stores it as fat and in turn,
increasing
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increases
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the body mass index.
Therefore
, when it is taken in large
amount
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amounts
show examples
, it
coud
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could
lead to
obesity
. Exercise helps the body to get rid of fat and
children
these days are not taking them.
This
could be
due to
them spending more time at school sitting and being on their devices,
as well as
prefering
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preferring
to be driven to school rather than walking. A combination of both
sedentary
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a sedentary
show examples
lifestyle and
diet
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a diet
show examples
low in nutrition is dangerous for
one
's health. Though there are many
ways
which
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apply
show examples
one
can use to solve
this
issue,
however
,
one
must have
a
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apply
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constant willpower
as well as
discipline in order to deal with
this
issue. It is difficult to overcome
this
because the
causes
of these diseases are
deep rooted
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deep-rooted
show examples
and complex.
However
,
one
of the
ways
which
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the goverment
show examples
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
can help is
fund
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to fund
show examples
in
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apply
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programmes that are designed to help these
children
and their parents to understand the
causes
of
obesity
and
then
to assist them in whatever
ways
to help them reach their goals.
In addition
, the
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
must address those restaurants and shops within which
its
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it is
show examples
very difficult to obtain nutritious
food
because they serve only fast
food
.
To conclude
, there is no doubt that it is crucial to deal with
obesity
among young people. As it is often caused by poor diet and insufficient exercise, educating
children
and their parents about the importance of both,
as well as
ensuring healthy
food
is available to all, will go a long way towards solving
this
problem.
Submitted by kevinleom12 on

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task achievement
Try to use specific examples to support your points more effectively. This will enhance the depth of your argument and demonstrate a thorough understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph is logically connected. Using linking sentences and cohesive devices can help improve the flow and coherence of your essays.
coherence cohesion
The essay begins with a clear introduction and ends with a solid conclusion, maintaining a cohesive structure.
task achievement
You provide a comprehensive range of ideas and suggestions on how to manage childhood obesity, which shows you have a good understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Dietary habits
  • Sedentary lifestyle
  • Processed foods
  • Socioeconomic status
  • Nutritional education
  • Obesity epidemic
  • Preventative measures
  • Health policies
  • Urban planning
  • Caloric intake
  • Metabolic health
  • Screen time
  • Physical activity
  • Junk food
  • Food desert
  • Body mass index (BMI)
  • Portion control
  • Mindful eating
  • Lifestyle diseases
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