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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people believe that artificial intelligence (AI) has the power to improve our lives. However, others are worried that it could have a negative impact. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

#people #intelligence #power #lives #impact
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Some people believe that artificial intelligence has the power to make our
lives
 easy,
while
 others think that it could have a negative impact.
This
 essay will discuss both views. In my opinion, artificial intelligence can make our
lives
 easy. There are many advantages of AI by which we being humans can improve our
lives
.
Such
 as, It can do anything very quickly and without human errors.
Furthermore
, It can
work
 without any breaks because it is not a living thing so, it does not get tired.
For example
, one of the studies shows that Apple is the world's fastest organisation which executes tasks very quickly the reason is that 90 per cent of their staff are
robots
 who
work
 24 hours a day, which means they do not take any breaks like humans
also
 they do not make any mistakes during
work
.
However
,
according to
 some communities,
robots
 can affect our
lives
 in a negative way. Because of their high efficiency, some people believe that unemployment can be caused by the use of
robots
.
In addition
, companies will prefer
robots
instead
 of people because they do not charge any money to
work
 a full day without any breaks.
For instance
, in my country Pakistan where unemployment is very common the main reason is that every institute in Pakistan is using artificial intelligence
instead
 of folks as it costs very low
as
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
compared to folks
also
 they
work
 with high efficiency and without making any errors. In conclusion, I prefer using AI to improve our
lives
. Even though there are disadvantages of AI the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.
Submitted by Saad Kamal on

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task achievement
Your essay addresses both views on artificial intelligence and provides a clear opinion on the topic. However, the explanation on how AI improves lives could be more detailed and provide additional examples.
coherence cohesion
Be careful with minor grammatical errors and punctuation, such as starting 'It' with a capital letter after a comma in the second paragraph. More varied sentence structures could improve readability and demonstrate a higher level of writing skill.
coherence cohesion
Each paragraph follows logically from the previous one, but consider adding more linking words or phrases to improve the overall flow. This will make your argument more cohesive and easy to follow.
task achievement
The introduction clearly states the purpose of the essay and outlines both sides of the argument. This helps set the stage for the discussion.
task achievement
The conclusion reiterates your own opinion effectively and summarizes the key points discussed in the essay.
task achievement
You have provided relevant examples, such as the use of AI in Apple and the situation in Pakistan. These examples help to illustrate your points and make your arguments more convincing.
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