IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below gives information about how people aged 25 - 34 are housed in the UK. Summerize the information by selecting and reporting on the features, and make comparisions where relevant.

The chart below gives information about how people aged 25 - 34 are housed in the UK. Summerize the information by selecting and reporting on the features, and make comparisions where relevant.
#information #people #uk #summerize #features #comparisions
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The bar chart illustrates data on the percentages of individuals aged 25 to 34 who own their homes and those who rent in the UK from 2004 to 2014.
Overall
Linking Words
, British
people
Use synonyms
 from
age
Correct article usage
the age
show examples
groups
Fix the agreement mistake
group
show examples
 25 to 34
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
old
Correct your spelling
would
show examples
 rather rent than
buying
Wrong verb form
buy
show examples
 their own house after 10
years
Fix the agreement mistake
year
show examples
 period. Looking at the
home owners
Correct your spelling
homeowners
show examples
, most of the
people
Use synonyms
 in the initial year
preferred
Add the particle
preferred to
show examples
 buy a house and it accounted for
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
just below two-fifths. In 2007, it experienced a decline
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 proportion and
hitting
Wrong verb form
hit
show examples
 a lower point at
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
slightly more than two-fifths in 2011 before hovering for two years. In 2014,
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
slightly more than a third
Use synonyms
people
Change preposition
of people
show examples
owning
Wrong verb form
owned
show examples
 a house. Regarding renters, they started at a fifths
then
Linking Words
 steadily
rise
Wrong verb form
rose
show examples
 to 41%
Use synonyms
people
Change preposition
of people
show examples
 renting
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
accommodation. In the same year as home
owner
Fix the agreement mistake
owners
show examples
, renters had an unchanging trend in 2011 and 2012 before reaching a peak point at 48%.
Submitted by tifjong on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words people with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • homeownership
  • renting
  • mortgage
  • down payment
  • property market
  • housing affordability
  • economic downturn
  • government incentives
  • interest rates
  • demographic shift
  • real estate
  • first-time buyers
  • market trends
  • property prices
  • financial stability
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