Some people say the government should give health care the first priorities, some others believe there are more important priorities to spend the taxpayer’s money. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #government #health #care #first #priorities #taxpayer’s #money

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Proponents of healthcare argue that the

government

Use synonyms

should prioritize it,

while

Linking Words

others claim that there are other crucial

sectors

Use synonyms

that the

government

Use synonyms

should take into consideration. I completely agree with the first statement as other

sectors

Use synonyms

would not be successful enough, if there were not healthy

citizens

Use synonyms

work

Use synonyms

in them. The majority of

people

Use synonyms

believe that other

sectors

Use synonyms

education

Use synonyms

are more significant than

healtcare

Correct your spelling

healthcare

health care

. Educated

people

Use synonyms

become quality workforce, and they

involve

Wrong verb form

are involved

show examples

in important areas like technology by making

state of art

Correct your spelling

state-of-the-art

show examples

products which are

higly

Correct your spelling

highly

demanded by many

people

Use synonyms

. They improve their local economy by boosting the revenues of companies they

work

Use synonyms

for and

facilitate

Wrong verb form

facilitating

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

economic growth. Take Samsung as an example, if there was no

high quality

Add a hyphen

high-quality

show examples

education

Use synonyms

in South Korea, Samsung would not hire intelligent employees and

turned

Change the verb form

turn

show examples

into one of the world's largest smartphone

brand

Fix the agreement mistake

brands

show examples

. Because both their own

citizens

Use synonyms

and foreign

people

Use synonyms

buy its product Samsung

foster

Correct subject-verb agreement

fosters

show examples

more inflow of money from sales both locally and globally.

However

Linking Words

, I think that if there was no good healthcare system,

education

Use synonyms

would not matter. If you do not have a sector that you can rely on whenever you feel ill or need serious medical surgery, you cannot be healthy enough to

work

Use synonyms

and make a living. Having access to free

high quality

Add a hyphen

high-quality

show examples

healtcare

Correct your spelling

healthcare

is important.

Citizens

Use synonyms

who are in good medical condition can live longer,

work

Use synonyms

longer, and bring more income tax to

country's

Correct article usage

the country's

show examples

budget. Take Germany as an example,

people

Use synonyms

can take advantage of medical services free of charge by

paing

Correct your spelling

paying

high income

Add a hyphen

high-income

show examples

taxes.

Besides

Linking Words

, they can deter

people

Use synonyms

form

Correct your spelling

from

show examples

going

elsewhere

Linking Words

for the same services and prevent

outflow

Add an article

the outflow

an outflow

show examples

of money from

county

Add an article

the county

show examples

For example

Linking Words

, in my country, Azerbaijan

people

Use synonyms

travel to other countries like Iran and Turkey to be diagnosed and cured properly.

This

Linking Words

trend damages the healthcare

Use synonyms

sectors

Fix the agreement mistake

sector

show examples

and causes trust issues among

people

Use synonyms

towards

Use synonyms

government

Correct article usage

the government

show examples

. In conclusion,

aother

Correct your spelling

another

other

sectors

Use synonyms

education

Use synonyms

can bring countries economic

benefit

Fix the agreement mistake

benefits

show examples

However

Linking Words

, it would not matter if

citizens

Use synonyms

turst

Correct your spelling

trust

the

government

Use synonyms

and live long enough to bring income tax to the country.

Submitted by Narmin on Tue Aug 20 2024

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grammar

Ensure all verbs are in the correct form. For example, in the second sentence, 'involve' should be 'are involved.'

vocabulary

Maintain consistent use of field-specific terminology. 'Turned' in 'turned into one of the world's largest smartphone brand' should be 'turned into one of the world's largest smartphone brands.'

coherence cohesion

Ensure all sentences logically flow from one to another. The transition between ideas is clear, but could be enhanced with linking phrases or words.

coherence cohesion

The essay presents a well-structured, balanced discussion on both views.

task achievement

The use of specific examples, such as Samsung and Germany, supports the arguments effectively.

coherence cohesion

The thesis is clear, and the conclusion aligns well with the arguments presented.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
23
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

347 words

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Some people say the government should give health care the first priorities, some others believe there are more important priorities to spend the taxpayer’s money. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Many children these days have an unhealthy lifestyle. Both schools and parents are responsible for solving this problem. To what extent do you agree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Some people like to eat in restaurants and at foodstands, others like to eat at home. Which do you prefer? Give reasons and examples to support your choice.

Some people think young people should be required to have full time education until they are at least 18 years old. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

homelessness is increasing in many major cities around the world. what do you think are the main causes of this problem and what measures can be taken to solve it?