Some people believe that technology has led to many positive developments in their lives, while others think technology is gradually taking over control of the way people live. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasoas for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or xperience
Most
of
people trust that Change preposition
apply
technology
make
positive effects Verb problem
has
in
Change preposition
on
humans
life but some Change the noun form
human
tuttes
Correct your spelling
tutors
belive
that Correct your spelling
believe
technology
is made
lots of negative development .I will discuss both views in Verb problem
has caused
upcoming
paragraph.
To commence with, Correct article usage
the upcoming
mobile
phone is Correct article usage
the mobile
very
big development of Correct article usage
a very
technology
because mobile phone
make our life easier and Fix the agreement mistake
phones
fast
.we can find anything and anywhere Replace the word
faster
with
Change preposition
in
few
seconds and get true information. Correct article usage
a few
Mobile
phone saves Add an article
The mobile
our
energy and time .Correct pronoun usage
us
In
Change preposition
On
Correct article usage
the others
others hands
, Fix the agreement mistake
other hand
medical
sector is very Add an article
the medical
progress
and good machines rather than past help with Replace the word
progressive
technology
. Doctor
can do any treatment Fix the agreement mistake
Doctors
with
safely and fast because they have lots of medical tools for treatment.
Change preposition
apply
Furthermore
, technology
is first
and foremost reason Add an article
the first
of
unemployment in our country because in job sites they need 100 people for work but Change preposition
for
presence
of machines .Add an article
the presence
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coherence cohesion
Your essay needs a clearer structure. Start with an introduction, provide body paragraphs discussing each point of view, and then give a conclusion.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph is well-developed and clearly focused on a single idea or point of view. Avoid jumping from one idea to another without smooth transitions.
task achievement
Improve grammatical accuracy and vocabulary choices. For instance, avoid phrases like 'most of people' and replace it with 'most people.'
task achievement
Support your ideas with specific and relevant examples. For example, instead of saying 'mobile phone saves our energy and time,' provide a scenario where this is evident.
task achievement
Write a clear conclusion to summarize your points and give your own opinion.
task achievement
You have made an effort to address both sides of the argument, which is good for task response.
task achievement
The use of technology examples like mobile phones and medical tools shows some relevant thinking.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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