Some people think that in order to deal with the problem of congestion in cities, privately owned vehicles should be banned in city centers, while others consider this to be an unrealistic solution.
One of the widely discussed issues nowadays is
Correct article usage
the bans
bans
Fix the agreement mistake
ban
of
private cars in certain city centres. It is undeniable that travel by vehicle has become an Change preposition
on
essentials
part of our life. Change the noun form
essential
However
, there is no absolute agreement as some people
find that using a car
on public beaches for ease of move are
beneficial, Change the verb form
is
while
others consider everything associated with associated with
inconvenience to other Remove the redundancy
apply
people
. Surely, there are both pros and cons to using a private cars
for your own purposes, but I believe Correct the article-noun agreement
private cars
a private car
advantages
outweigh Correct article usage
the advantages
disadvantages
.
One of Correct article usage
the disadvantages
main
positives of using a Add an article
the main
car
in
convenient movement is that gives more opportunities for transporting your things, or Change preposition
for
traveling
with your familyChange the spelling
travelling
,
when the Remove the comma
apply
car
is nearby it makes everything easier. Another advantage is that a private car
, as for me, does not bother anyone and everyone has the right to use it for their own needs. A good example here is when you go with your family to somewhere relax for example
to the beach it will be easier for you to go to
closer to the sea and accommodate your things, tend, etc. there.
Turning to the other side of the argument, it is undeniable that the Change preposition
apply
car
also
has a negative impact on the environment, especially if it is on gas fuel. Another major disadvantage is security
of Add an article
the security
a security
people
there are a lot of accidents with people
's safety.
Having weighed everything mentioned up, we can come to a
conclusion that Correct article usage
the
people
have the right to use private cars for their own needs, but we need to think about the safety of other people
too.Submitted by dnm.best on
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task achievement
Avoid repetition and overuse of phrases. For example, 'associated with associated with should be avoided.
task achievement
Try to better elaborate on the examples provided. For instance, the example of going to the beach can delve deeper into the advantages.
coherence cohesion
Although you discuss the pros and cons, try to balance the arguments more evenly to avoid showing bias towards one view.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction sets a good context for the discussion and ends with a clear thesis statement.
introduction conclusion present
The essay contains a conclusion that sums up the discussion and reiterates your point of view.
complete response
The main points of the essay are clear and relevant to the task.
coherence cohesion
Connecting phrases and words like 'Turning to the other side of the argument' are well used.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.