More and more adults are playing computer games Why is this happening? Is it a positive or negative trend?
Nowadays,
video
games
are popular among adults
more than before. In my opinion, playing video
games
helps them to relief. I am also
convinced that playing is a positive development because is
enhances their creativity.
It is my view that the widespread use of Correct your spelling
it
video
games
by adults
helps them to decrease their stress levels and help them to clear their minds from all the challenges that they encounter in their daily and work life
. These days we live in a society Fix the agreement mistake
lives
that
people struggle to achieve more goals in their Correct word choice
where
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
for example
to have a higher salary or be more successful in their own business. Therefore
, these can make our life
more and more stressful and can lead to burnout. Playing Fix the agreement mistake
lives
video
games
help
them to put all their stressful thoughts behind and refresh their body and mind. Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
for instance
, I play video
games
online every time I come back from my workplace which not only help
me forget all the challenges I had in the workplace for a short time but Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
also
helps me to communicate with my friends and have interactions with them.
I further
believe that playing games
forces our brain
to be more curious and be more imaginative. Creativity is the main key to being successful both in real Fix the agreement mistake
brains
life
and the virtual world of games
. Indeed, we can solve lots of our daily problems with creativity. For instance
, a video
game named Sims which is an extremely popular game among adults
teaches us how to have better communication with others and how to take care of our houses by making tools ourselves and using them to maintain our house.
In conclusion, playing video
games
helps adults
to relief and it is the best way to give rest to our brain. From my perspective, games
help us to be more creative in daily life
and teach us communication skills.Submitted by keyhan.mp on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
The essay could benefit from a smoother and more diverse range of linking words and cohesive devices to enhance the logical flow from one main idea to another.
task achievement
Ensure that you fully address all aspects of the task prompt in a balanced way, discussing both the reasons behind the trend and the positive and negative aspects equally.
task achievement
Work on providing deeper analysis and more specific examples to support your main points. This will add depth and clarity to your response.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well-structured and present in the essay, providing a clear framework for the arguments discussed.
task achievement
The essay clearly addresses the main question, providing reasonable explanations for why adults play video games and presenting the viewpoint that this is a positive development.
task achievement
Good use of personal examples, which help to illustrate and support the points being made.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.
‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.
Examples:
I really want to study but I’m too tired.
I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.
If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.