Some people say that modern technology has made shopping today easier while others disagree. Discuss both view and give your opinion.
There is debate over whether the latest
technology
has made shopping easier currently or not, with number
of thinking that shopping has become more comfortable and Change the article
a number
the number
simply
with up-to-date innovation and others arguing that online shopping is really unreliable. Change the word
simple
Personally
I think, current Add a comma
Personally,
technology
makes purchasing more effortless.
Nowadays, most people
are complaining that technology
is not a help but an issue in the modern world. For instance
, when we order any items
from internet shops, as a result
of delaying of items
, we often have to wait at least 2 weeks or more. Furthermore
, if you purchase something on the internet you cannot physically insect
products which can lead to dissatisfaction or returns if Correct your spelling
inspect
items
do not meet expectation
.
Fix the agreement mistake
expectations
On the other hand
, many people
are satisfied that new innovation
Fix the agreement mistake
innovations
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
carried
more upsides than drawbacks in shopping. Verb problem
brought
For example
, individuals have no need to go out in order to purchase items
due to
the
society can buy them from online platforms in just a few seconds. Correct article usage
apply
Secondly
, set
another reason is Verb problem
apply
that
saving Correct determiner usage
apply
time
of
Change preposition
for
people
to do something instead
of leave
home for shopping.
From my point of view, even though there are some Change the verb form
leaving
drowbacks
which Correct your spelling
drawbacks
delaying
of delivery the Wrong verb form
delay
items
and also
fraud, it has a number of advantages related to purchasing. Online shopping allows customers to buy products from anywhere,at any time
, not to visit physical stores.
To conclude
, modern technology
makes many advancements in latest
Correct article usage
the latest
time
, which is why people
buy online and save time
. everything is useful on the Earth and good with limit
.Fix the agreement mistake
limits
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Coherence and Cohesion
Work on refining your sentence structures to make your points clearer and more cohesive. For example, some sentences are a bit lengthy and can be broken down into shorter, more concise sentences for better readability.
Task Achievement
Include more specific examples. While you have addressed both viewpoints, the arguments could be more detailed. For example, give a concrete instance of a time when online shopping was extremely convenient or when it failed due to a delivery delay.
Task Achievement
Avoid generalizations. Ensure that your points are specific and well-supported. Statements like 'most people are complaining' should be backed with evidence or examples.
General
Pay attention to grammatical accuracy. Minor grammatical errors can detract from the overall quality of your essay.
Task Achievement
Your essay covers both viewpoints and provides a balanced perspective, which is essential for a well-rounded discussion.
Coherence and Cohesion
The introduction and conclusion clearly outline the main argument and wrap up the essay effectively.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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