IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

You are going on holiday and have just remembered that your aunt lives in one of the cities you will be visiting. Write a letter to your aunt. In your letter: •Tell her about your holiday plans •Ask if you can stay with her for a portion of the trip •Explain how you will make it up to her Write at least 150 words. You do NOT need to write any addresses. Begin your letter as follows: Dear Aunt Sally,

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Dear Aunt Sally, I hope
this
Linking Words
 letter finds you in good health and in high spirits. I'm thrilled to inform you about my upcoming visit to your city Toronto for my summer vacation. As I've completed my second term exam, I am going to get
two
Correct determiner usage
a
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weeks
Correct your spelling
two-week
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 break prior to my following term. I'm planning to explore Toronto as it is on my summer list. One of my
friend
Change to a plural noun
friends
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 is
also
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 living there so she told me that there are numerous beaches to view the best sunset and
cherry
Correct article usage
the cherry
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 on top is that there is a festive fare coming ahead in the city so I would love to join that. I was writing to you
that If
Correct your spelling
to ask if
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 you can help me to arrange the accommodation or
Can
Correct word choice
if Can
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 I stay with you If you
will be
Wrong verb form
are
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 comfortable with that? As I'm a newcomer to the city
so
Correct word choice
apply
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I don't know much about the best hotels or airbnbs. I have already purchased a train ticket, the total distance is of 4 hours so I'll be there by the evening of next coming Monday and my friend will pick me up from the railway station as soon as I arrive there. I'll be waiting for your response and excited to see you soon. Best wishes, Ravinder

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single idea per paragraph
Ensure each paragraph presents a single clear idea. For example, the paragraph about your travel arrangement could be separated from the request for accommodation.
logical structure
Improve logical structure for a smoother flow, such as mentioning your friend's information right after your holiday plans.
suitable writing tone
The tone is appropriately friendly and warm, suitable for writing to a family member.
complete response
The letter addresses all parts of the task effectively - holiday plans, request for accommodation, and how you will appreciate the help.
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