It is sometimes possible to pay somebody to do things you don’t want to do, or don't have time to do, for example household chores or looking after children. Is this a good way of providing work for others? Should people do these things for themselves?

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this

Linking Words

modern world where all

people

Use synonyms

suffer from their busy schedules , It is a common trend to delegate some non-specialized work to third parties. From my perspective, it not only could provide job opportunities for some other

people

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, but

also

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it could lead to work-life balance. To launch into

this

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topic, offering some simple work to other

people

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could provide some employment opportunities and improve their economic situation. To illustrate more, we can imagine some students, single parents and disadvantaged

people

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who need to meet their requirements by working in simple positions

such

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as taking care of children or household chores. Needless to mention, they not only could manage their lives

Remove the comma

apply

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but

also

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their self-confidence and financial independence will be strengthened.

Furthermore

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, delegating some usual

tasks

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to others can increase the crowd’s productivity.

For instance

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, when humans support each other in their duties, they can

concentrated

Change the verb form

be concentrated

concentrate

show examples

more on their specialized or enjoyable missions and

consequently

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their quality of

tasks

Use synonyms

will be elevated.

For example

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, I asked a woman to take care of my 8-year-old daughter on summer days, so my stress level decreased a lot and I could free up my mind and focus on my job.

Therefore

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, outsourcing

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

mundane

tasks

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such

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as household chores can improve the quality of life and

allocated

Wrong verb form

allocate

show examples

specialized

tasks

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. In a nutshell, it is logical to ask some others to assist us in our parental and household responsibilities. Since we provide some job opportunities to others and

also

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do our

tasks

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efficiently.

zohmoz93Fri Aug 23 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that all points in your introduction are clearly connected to the rest of the essay. Smooth transitions between your reasons would strengthen your essay further.

task achievement

While your essay provides a complete response to the topic, make sure to directly address the second question ('Should people do these things for themselves?') a bit more explicitly in your essay.

coherence cohesion

Although your essay is coherent, varying your linking words and phrases can enhance the flow. Diversifying phrases like 'needless to mention' with synonyms and expressions could be beneficial.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a clear structure with a well-defined introduction and conclusion, which helps the reader follow your argument easily.

task achievement

You provide relevant and specific examples that support your main points, such as the scenario of asking a woman to take care of your daughter. This adds depth to your argument.

task achievement

Your ideas are clear and comprehensive, showing a good understanding of the topic and its implications.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

251 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

employment opportunities
specialization
productivity
work-life balance
economic benefits
independent contractors
life skills
self-sufficiency
financial expense
job creation
delegate tasks
time management
personal well-being
stress alleviation
household chores
flexible work

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It is sometimes possible to pay somebody to do things you don’t want to do, or don't have time to do, for example household chores or looking after children. Is this a good way of providing work for others? Should people do these things for themselves?

Your opinion

The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. To wht extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

some places old age is valued, while in other cultures youth is considered more important. Disscuss both views and give your opinion

With recent developments in technology like e-books, some people feel that printed media like books, newspaper and magazines will soon be a thing of the past. Others feel that these forms of media will never disappear. What is your opinion?

Some employers involve employees in the decision-making process of products and services. What are the advantages and disadvantages?