Universities and colleges are now offering qualifications through distance learning from the internet rather than teachers in classrooms. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

E-learning or online
classes
have become quite popular ever since the pandemic.I strongly believe,offline
classes
or
in school
Add a hyphen
in-school
show examples
learning to be more effective than online.As it encourages students to interact well with their peers and teachers.
One
Correct your spelling
On
show examples
the one hand,offline
classes
to contribute
a bteer
Correct word choice
better
show examples
growth towards a student's life as
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
allows
Correct subject-verb agreement
allow
show examples
them to get
along with
their classmates and exchange ideas.
Furthermore
,studies have proven children in offline
classes
tend to have a
dtronger
Correct your spelling
stronger
grasp
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
the concepts rather than the ones who opt for home-school.
Submitted by rehanaafeesrs on

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task achievement
Your essay has a clear stance on the topic; however, it lacks sufficient examples and details to support your points. Try to elaborate more on how offline classes contribute to better growth and grasp of concepts.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. Your ideas are there, but they need to be connected more clearly to make the essay flow better. Consider using linking words such as 'Firstly,' 'Additionally,' and 'Moreover.'
coherence cohesion
There should be a clear introduction and conclusion to frame your essay. Start by paraphrasing the topic and stating your opinion clearly in the introduction. Summarize your main points and restate your stance in the conclusion.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear opinion on the topic, advocating for offline learning.
task achievement
The points made are relevant to the topic and support your argument.
coherence cohesion
Your writing shows a good attempt to structure arguments with different sections.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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