Humans have made a great technological process in the last hundred years. However, this progress has negative effects on people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Over the
last
century, significant technological advances have been made.
Such
advancements
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
sparked a debate about whether
this
progress has negative effects on
people
's
lives
or not.
While
some claim that those improvements are not harmful, I completely believe that they have harmful impacts on individuals.
Firstly
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
technological progress has led
some
Change preposition
to some
show examples
serious health issues. As technology improves,
people
's tendency to
inactiviy
Correct your spelling
inactivity
increases.
For instance
, after the invention of transportation
vehicles
Add a comma
vehicles,
show examples
people
begin to walk less, causing obesity, diabetes and heart
realted
Correct your spelling
related
diseases.
Besides
that, technology made reaching dopamine much easier than ever.
People
often spend most of their time on
socail
Correct your spelling
social
media platforms or streaming applications,
such
as Netflix and Amazon Prime, making them get used to high dopamine levels which make them prone to
pshycological
Correct your spelling
psychological
problems
such
as depression and anxiety .
Secondly
,
people
started to live more artificial
lives
with the
techonolgical
Correct your spelling
technological
improvements. The increasing social media usage is the most important reason for
such
lives
.
People
create their own profiles
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
those platforms and share whatever they want, it doesn't have to be true.
This
way
people
can create their own reality only which can be known by others. There is no way to know how their actual
lives
are.
Such
artificial realities cause the individuals who created them to
belive
Correct your spelling
believe
show examples
those are their real
lives
, making them
detch
Correct your spelling
detach
detached
from the actual reality. In conclusion,
while
some argue that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Correct your spelling
technological
technologocal
Correct your spelling
technological
advancements don't have bad influences on
people
's
lives
Submitted by kalkan_emre on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Conclude your essay with a complete sentence that wraps up your argument. This will strengthen your overall response.
coherence cohesion
Try to avoid spelling and grammar mistakes to make your essay more professional and easier to read. Paying extra attention to details will help you to avoid points deductions.
task achievement
Develop your ideas more comprehensively, explaining how each example supports your main point. This will make your argument more convincing.
coherence cohesion
Use devices like conjunctions and connectors to improve the flow between your paragraphs. A smooth transition is important for better coherence.
task achievement
Your essay covers all components of the task and includes relevant examples, which helps illustrate your points clearly.
task achievement
You have used specific examples which strongly support your main arguments and show the negative impact of technological advancements.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • technological progress
  • automation
  • artificial intelligence
  • manual labor jobs
  • unemployment rates
  • sedentary lifestyle
  • health issues
  • obesity
  • cardiovascular diseases
  • mental health disorders
  • social relationships
  • face-to-face interactions
  • feelings of loneliness
  • environmental degradation
  • production and disposal
  • pollution
  • depletion of natural resources
  • medical science
  • global communication
  • information dissemination
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!