Some people think that the use of mobiles (cell) phones should be banned in public places such as in libraries, shops and on public transport. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Many
people
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believe that there should be a ban on the use of digital technology tools in public spaces
such
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as shopping
centers
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centres
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, libraries, and modes of transport. I strongly disagree with
this
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perspective because, with the rise of technology,
smartphones
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have become an integral part of our daily lives. On one hand,
smartphones
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offer numerous benefits, providing convenience and efficiency. Banning them in public areas is not a viable solution.
For instance
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,
people
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use their
phones
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for quick payments, easily finding products and accessing related information, or
utilizing
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utilising
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discount apps. Mobile
phones
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serve as the primary means of connection among individuals, regardless of their locations. They
also
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allow
people
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to access real-time tracking of public buses and to book rides conveniently.
Thus
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,
this
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technology has granted us freedom and has significantly enhanced our quality of life.
However
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, there are valid arguments for banning
smartphones
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in public spaces.
First,
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using mobile
phones
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in crowded venues can be disruptive to others. A sudden ringtone,
for example
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, can distract a bus driver, potentially leading to unsafe situations.
Furthermore
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, taking photos or recording videos in public can infringe upon the privacy of those around us. Many
people
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feel uncomfortable when they are unknowingly filmed or photographed, and
this
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has been a frequent complaint among celebrities who are often pursued by paparazzi in public areas. In conclusion,
while
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there are compelling reasons to consider banning
smartphones
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in certain places like libraries, transport, and shops
due to
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noise disruption and safety concerns, we must
also
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acknowledge the significant advantages they offer in terms of convenience, efficiency, and connectivity. Rather than imposing a blanket ban on mobile
phones
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in public places, we should encourage individuals to keep their devices on silent mode to
minimize
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minimise
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disturbances.

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task achievement
Make your view very clear in one line at the start and keep to it. avoid mixing many ideas in a small place.
task achievement
Explain more how the idea would work in real life, with simple steps or often scenes.
coherence
Link ideas with simple, easy words so the plan stays smooth.
language
Use easy words and short sentences so a wide reader can read it well.
structure
Each paragraph should have one big idea and a small set of details.
task response
The essay shows a clear view and asks the right question.
coherence
Good use of linking words like On one hand and However.
structure
Conclusion gives a fair end and a possible fix.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • distraction
  • concentration
  • noise pollution
  • emergencies
  • individual freedoms
  • infringe
  • courteous behavior
  • regulation
  • permissible
  • enforce
  • disruption
  • public transport
  • public spaces
  • notifications
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