These days many kids spend a lot of their time playing computer games instead of doing sports. What is the cause of this? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

#kids #time #computer #games #sports #development

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These days many kids spend a lot of their time playing video

games

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instead

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of doing

sports

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due to

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numerous reasons.

Firstly

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, computer

games

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do not require the player to step outside; they can be played from the convenience of their home. Most

sports

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are outdoor and require stepping outside subjecting the player to the outside environment which is not always pleasant

whereas

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video

games

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can be enjoyed right from one's room in a controlled environment. Another reason for avoidance of

sports

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can be the risk of injury which can cause discomfort and pain.

Secondly

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, these

games

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do not require a lot of learning to get started like in

sports

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where a player must spend time understanding the rules and hone their skills before even getting started.

For example

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, cricket requires a beginner to learn how to hold the bat and the mechanics of bowling before they can start playing.

Lastly

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, kids in

this

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generation have been exposed to a lot of technology right from birth which has affected their interaction with the world. They prefer to interact with the world digitally not only for entertainment but

also

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for socialising. In my opinion,

this

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is a negative development as

this

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can have a negative impact on a

child

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overall

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development. Participating in

sports

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can help a

child

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achieve better physical health

due to

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the amount of physical activity involved. Inspiring more kids to take up

sports

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can

also

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help combat increasing childhood obesity as it is proven that physically active children are less likely to become obese later in life. Most

sports

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also

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require teamwork, discipline, and leadership which are crucial for

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overall

Add an article

the overall

show examples

development of a

child

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Additionally

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sports

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also

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develop a

child

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's ability to form and maintain social connections.

Submitted by nakuleshj1998 on Sat Aug 24 2024

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task achievement

Expand more on the specific impacts of playing video games on children’s development. This will provide a deeper analysis and improve your score in 'complete response.'

coherence cohesion

Ensure each paragraph flows smoothly into the next. Using more transitional phrases can enhance the coherence and cohesion of your essay.

task achievement

You provided clear and comprehensive ideas about the causes and effects of the trend.

coherence cohesion

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, and the main points are well-supported.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

290 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

sedentary lifestyle
accessibility
sophisticated marketing
addictive design
screen time
parental influence
safety concerns
indoor activities
social aspect
introverted
traditional sports
inadvertently
capture children's attention

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These days many kids spend a lot of their time playing computer games instead of doing sports. What is the cause of this? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Fully explain your ideas

In the past, when students did a university degree, they tended to study in their own country. Nowadays, they have more opportunity to study abroad. What are the advantages and disadvantages of thi development?

The Research Studies show that overeating is equal ly harmful to people’s health as smoking. Therefore, the advertisements of certain food products should be banned similar to cigarettes. To what extent you agree?

In many countries today, crime novels and Tv crime dramas are becoming more and more popular. Why do you think these books and Tv shows are popular? What is your opinion of crime fiction and Tv crime dramas?

The growing number of overweight people is putting a strain on the healthcare system in an effort to deal with the health issues involved. Some people think that the best way to solve this problem is to introduce more physical education lessons. To what extent do you agree or disagree?