Some companies sponsor sport as a way to advertise themselves. Some people think it is good for the world of sports, while others think there are disadvantages. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Sport
is one
of the most popular activites
that Correct your spelling
activities
people
do nowadays, from children to adults everbody
loves Correct your spelling
everybody
sport
. Furhermore
, Correct your spelling
Furthermore
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
also
become one
of many ways companies
advertise their products. Some people
believe it gives
Verb problem
has
beneficial
impact Add an article
a beneficial
for
the world of Change preposition
on
sports
, while
others argue it could lead to negative development. I firmly agree that promoting sports
through companies
is a good way. This
essay will explore why this
is good or not.
On the one
hand, companies
exert many benefits for sports
itself. Firstly
, they can assist some sports
that have financial burden
. Fix the agreement mistake
burdens
For example
, football clubs need to pay their player salaries, companies
can help them by providing financial aid. Secondly
, companies
provide facilities and bonuses for the athlete
that have a contract with them. Fix the agreement mistake
athletes
This
is a very good condition, both for the athlete and the companies
, the company
will receive exposure from the public and the athlete will be ensured their career growth.
On the other hand
, some people
consider that it could bring many drawbacks. Firstly
, the world of sports
will really rely on the company
to run the industry. For instance
, without any company
to invest in competition
Fix the agreement mistake
competitions
such
as basketball league
, the competition will not run. Fix the agreement mistake
leagues
Secondly
, collaboration from both parties will impact each other attention. If one
of them is on the wrong track, the other one
also
will get the impact.
In conclusion, the benefits of companies
investing in the world of sports
outweigh its drawbacks. It
really beneficial for both parties. The Add a verb
It is
It was
sport
industry will gain Change the noun form
sports
supports
from the Fix the agreement mistake
support
company
and the company
will attract people
attention. I Change noun form
people's
undoubtely
Correct your spelling
undoubtedly
agree
the idea that Add the preposition
agree on
agree to
agree with
companies
should colaborate
with the Correct your spelling
collaborate
sport
industry.Change the noun form
sports
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coherence cohesion
Although your essay is generally well-structured with a clear introduction and conclusion, consider enhancing the logical flow between paragraphs. This can be done by adding more transitional sentences that link each point seamlessly.
task achievement
Your essay responds effectively to the task and covers both perspectives, but try to delve a bit deeper into the arguments presented. Providing more detailed examples and elaborating on the potential consequences could strengthen your response.
task achievement
The essay presents a balanced discussion of both views regarding companies sponsoring sports, which shows a good understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
You have a well-defined introduction and conclusion. These sections effectively set the stage for and wrap up your arguments.
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