It is common aspiration among many young people to run their own business, rather than work for an employer. Do you think the advantages of working for yourself outweigh the drawbacks?

#aspiration #people #business #work #employer

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Since the beginning of the

industrial revolution

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Industrial Revolution

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, a great amount of public interest has been stimulated by capitalist entrepreneur culture to start their very own

business

and to

this

day, many individuals and more distinctly, youngsters tend to thrive on building a

business

rather than working as an employee. I think when compared with employment, becoming an

entreprenuer

Correct your spelling

entrepreneur

comes with a plethora of advantages with limited drawbacks. Starting a

business

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

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many advantages over working as an employee the most important of which is gaining independence. When you are your own boss, you have the freedom to make the decisions that are crucial to your own

business

success.

This

will eventually lead to assessing a

succesful

Correct your spelling

successful

occupation and

guranteeing

Correct your spelling

guaranteeing

your senior years.

Moreover

, being in charge of handling all aspects of the job, creates many learning opportunities. When

wresting

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wrestling

show examples

with

problem

Fix the agreement mistake

problems

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and having no one to help you with them, you will slowly learn

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apply

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how to handle every problem.

This

situation creates numerous opportunities to gain a thorough understanding of the various

business

functions.

On the other

hand

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hand,

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there is a downside to choosing

being

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to be

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an "

entreployee

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employee

Firstly

, substantial capital is needed to start a

business

. One may need to commit most of his savings or even go into debt to get started and

this

risk is even more extensive for youngsters with little financial resources. If things do not go as

predectied

Correct your spelling

predicted

, the founder may be faced with thousands of

dollar

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dollars

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in loss.

Secondly

, running a

business

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apply

show examples

extremely time-consuming.

Although

often

poeple

Correct your spelling

people

start businesses to have more time to spend with their families and friends, most probably they will not be able to get away.

Consequently

, the youth may regret having allocated their springtime to setting up financial success. In conclusion, in spite of all the disadvantages, entrepreneurship provides a fresh start and countless

potentials

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potential

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for a young person.

Submitted by ronakdorrii on Sun Aug 25 2024

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General

Make sure to proofread your essay to correct small grammatical and spelling mistakes. This will enhance the clarity of your arguments.

task achievement

Try to include specific examples or case studies to support your arguments better. This can help in making your points more convincing.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and that ideas flow logically from one paragraph to the next.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which provides a strong framework for your arguments.

task achievement

You provided good arguments on both sides of the topic, which shows that you can consider different perspectives.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

313 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

aspiration
entrepreneur
flexibility
decision-making
financial rewards
personal fulfillment
challenges
financial risk
invested capital
cash flow
guaranteed income
work-life balance
responsibility
pressure
burnout

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It is common aspiration among many young people to run their own business, rather than work for an employer. Do you think the advantages of working for yourself outweigh the drawbacks?

Fully explain your ideas

In spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?

Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types of relationships that people make? Has this been a positive or negative development?

Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.