56. Some people think that children should begin their formal education at a very early age and should spend most of their time on school studies. Others believe that young children should spend most of their time playing. Compare these two views. Which view do you agree with? Why?

There is a

spilt

Correct your spelling

split

show examples

opinion regarding

Remove the preposition

apply

show examples

how

children

Use synonyms

should spend their

time

Use synonyms

. Some

believes

Change the verb form

believe

show examples

that

children

Use synonyms

significantly need to use their

time

Use synonyms

though-out

Correct your spelling

throughout

show examples

Change preposition

apply

show examples

school studies to enhance their

education

Use synonyms

process,

whereas

Linking Words

another group of thinkers support that kids should use

time

Use synonyms

more on playing rather than studying.

Linking Words

However

Add a comma

However,

show examples

both

has

Correct subject-verb agreement

have

show examples

Correct pronoun usage

their

show examples

pros and cons.

Therefore

Linking Words

, before commenting on my decision, both

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

opinions would be discussed. Examining the

farmer

Fix the agreement mistake

farmers

show examples

opinion,

children

Use synonyms

’s

education

Use synonyms

crucial

Add an article

a crucial

show examples

path for

them

Change the pronoun

their

show examples

future. To elaborate more, spending

time

Use synonyms

somethings

Fix the agreement mistake

something

show examples

useful

such

Linking Words

as learning

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

develop

Use synonyms

Correct article usage

a child

show examples

child

Change noun form

child's

show examples

knowledge and cognitive thinking.

For example

Linking Words

, there are summer schools

present

Correct pronoun usage

that present

show examples

entertainment curriculums which help students

Correct your spelling

show examples

promote their mental skills and

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

prepare them

Change preposition

for

show examples

the next level at school.

As a result

Linking Words

children

Use synonyms

become with

Verb problem

need

show examples

more knowledge and

education

Use synonyms

experience to be successful

learning

Change preposition

in learning

show examples

compare

Wrong verb form

compared

show examples

with his/ her

peer

Fix the agreement mistake

peers

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In addition

Linking Words

, they

also

Linking Words

believe that a very early age plays a

dramatically

Change the adverb

dramatic

show examples

role in

child

Use synonyms

development and the experience

Use synonyms

child

Correct article usage

a child

show examples

gathering through study will influence positively on enter life.

On the contrary

Linking Words

, the

later

Correct your spelling

latter

show examples

view

suggest

Change the verb form

suggests

show examples

that playing is

essential

Add an article

an essential

show examples

part

Change preposition

show examples

young

children

Use synonyms

. They need to build their social environment

via

Change preposition

show examples

playing with others. To explain, the idea of sharing and playing with another

child

Use synonyms

establishes a sense of communication and challenge between each

others

Change to a singular noun

other

show examples

. So. They will ameliorate the individual’s personality and they will have a strong independent person in future who can avoid any problems.

Beside

Replace the word

Besides

show examples

this

Linking Words

spend

Wrong verb form

spending

show examples

time

Use synonyms

Change preposition

apply

show examples

playing reduces

Use synonyms

child’s

Correct article usage

a child’s

show examples

super-activity; some kids

had

Wrong verb form

have

show examples

energy and power inside them ,so

the

Correct your spelling

they

show examples

need to decrease it by playing to not

herd

Verb problem

hurt

show examples

themself.

Change preposition

show examples

conclusion,

spend

Wrong verb form

spending

show examples

time

Use synonyms

Change preposition

apply

show examples

studying articles and books will develop cognitive knowledge

as well as

Linking Words

preparing

Wrong verb form

prepare

show examples

Use synonyms

child

Fix the agreement mistake

children

show examples

Change preposition

for

show examples

Correct article usage

the next

show examples

level at school ,

while

Linking Words

employ

Change the verb form

employing

show examples

time

Use synonyms

Change preposition

for

show examples

playing establishes a good personality of

Use synonyms

child

Add an article

a child

the child

show examples

at nearly

Rephrase

in the near

show examples

future. In my perspective, parents should

Change the verb form

apply

show examples

balance

time

Use synonyms

Change preposition

with

show examples

their

children

Use synonyms

to present

Change the article

show examples

excellent

education

Use synonyms

and

entertainment

Replace the word

entertaining

show examples

childhood via using

Use synonyms

time

Add an article

the time

show examples

to develop

children

Use synonyms

’s abilities in all aspects of scientific and practical life.

sheikha1996mohammed

Aug 25, 2024

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coherence

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
55
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

347 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Cognitive development
Intellectual growth
Structured learning environment
Discipline
Focus
Social skills
Emotional regulation
Conflict resolution
Creativity
Imagination
Holistic development
Play-based learning
Burnout
Holistic approach
Specialized subjects

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56. Some people think that children should begin their formal education at a very early age and should spend most of their time on school studies. Others believe that young children should spend most of their time playing. Compare these two views. Which view do you agree with? Why?

Some people think that success in life comes from hard work and determination,while other think that tere are more important factors such as money and appearance.Discuss both views and give your opinion.

6.Nowadays, the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways technology affected the types of relationships people make? Has this become a positive or negative development?

Some people believe that in the future, environmental problems will mean that we are unable to live on this planet. In order to survive, the human species will need to find another planet that can support life. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?