Some people think that success in life comes from hard work and determination, while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearence. Discuss both views and give your opinion

#people #success #life #work #determination #factors #money #appearence

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Hard

work

Use synonyms

and

determination

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are definitely important

factors

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for

success

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in life.

However

Linking Words

, other

factors

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including

appearence

Correct your spelling

appearance

money

Use synonyms

and connections are

also

Linking Words

important for

success

Use synonyms

. It is usually a mix of the aforementioned

factors

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that

results

Change the verb form

result

show examples

success

Use synonyms

. An individual lacking hard

work

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and

determination

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cannot achieve any meaningful

success

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. Consistent efforts over extended periods of time can improve the odds of

success

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in any field. Through consistent efforts, a person can develop and improve the skills required to achieve mastery in the chosen field. In turn, mastery can significantly increase the likelihood of

success

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Determination

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also

Linking Words

plays an important role as the road to

success

Use synonyms

is long and filled with hurdles. A person can overcome any hurdles through a strong resolve to succeed.

For example

Linking Words

, hard

work

Use synonyms

and

determination

Use synonyms

play a key role in a sportsperson's

success

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On the other hand

Linking Words

, superficial

factors

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including

money

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and

appearence

Correct your spelling

appearance

can influence an individual's ability to succeed. These

factors

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are important

due to

Linking Words

the perception of the general public which associates looks and

money

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with

success

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Additionally

Linking Words

, the impact of appearance can be major in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

certain industries

such

Linking Words

as modelling and acting.

For example

Linking Words

, a very attractive aspiring actor is more likely to be a successful actor than an unattractive peer. The unattractive actor may have to prove their acting skills more than their attractive counterpart. In my opinion,

factors

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

money

Use synonyms

and

appearence

Correct your spelling

appearance

are important

although

Linking Words

they are not substitutes for hard

work

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and

determination

Use synonyms

. I believe hard

work

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and

determination

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are primary

factors

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whereas

Linking Words

the other two are secondary.

However

Linking Words

, the road to

success

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becomes much easier for a hardworking and determined individual with looks,

money

Use synonyms

or both.

Submitted by nakuleshj1998 on Mon Aug 26 2024

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General

Try to include a broader range of vocabulary to make the essay more engaging.

General

Make sure to further elaborate on the examples used to strengthen your arguments.

Task Achievement

The essay clearly discusses both views and provides a personal opinion.

Coherence and Cohesion

The logical structure of the essay is solid with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.

Task Achievement

Main points are well-supported and explained with appropriate examples.

Coherence and Cohesion

The essay maintains a consistent and coherent flow of ideas.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

280 words

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Some people think that success in life comes from hard work and determination, while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearence. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Include an introduction and conclusion

Some people believe that teenagers should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time. This can benefit teenagers and the community as well. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

Some people think that new houses should be built in the same style as older houses in the local area. Others disagree and say that local authorities should allow people to build houses in the styles of their own choice. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

The use of social media such as Facebook or Twitter is replacing face-to-face contact this century. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Are classes, such as painting and drawing, are as important to a child's development as other subjects, so it should be compulsory in high schools. To what extent do you agree or disagree?