Some people think that environmental problems are too big for individuals to solve. Others, however, believe that these problems cannot be solved if individuals do not take actions. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Whether individuals are the primary force in containing environmental
problems
has long been debated. In my opinion, individuals are essential in the solving of certain issues, Use synonyms
while
they play a minor or even Linking Words
non-existence
role in others.
Correct your spelling
non-existent
First,
for environmental Linking Words
problems
that are closely related to Use synonyms
individual’s
actions in life, Correct article usage
an individual’s
such
as air pollution caused by traffic and garbage classification, it is natural that Linking Words
individual’s
actions matter greatly in solving them. Correct article usage
an individual’s
For example
, if each citizen drives less and Linking Words
take
public transportation more frequently, there would be much fewer smog days in the city; if each person actively and appropriately classifies their trash, more would be recycled Correct subject-verb agreement
takes
while
less landfill and raw materials used.
Linking Words
Second,
the solving of Linking Words
macro environmental
Add a hyphen
macro-environmental
problems
that are caused on an industrial scale usually Use synonyms
have
little to do with Correct subject-verb agreement
has
individual’s
Change noun form
individual
action
but Fix the agreement mistake
actions
closely
related to governmental regulation. Add a missing verb
is closely
For example
, the emission of pollutants into water is usually caused by manufacturing, and only state authorities are able to regulate Linking Words
such
pollution through incentives Linking Words
such
as penalties for heavy polluters and subsidies for new clean technology.
Linking Words
Last
but not Linking Words
the
least, Correct article usage
apply
the
control Correct article usage
apply
on
certain Change preposition
of
problems
requires actions from both individuals and businesses. Use synonyms
For example
, air pollution is not only caused by traffic but Linking Words
emission
from factories and even the farming of Fix the agreement mistake
emissions
cattles
, and it is through the synergy among all these involved parties that an effective measure can be taken.Correct your spelling
cattle
castles
Submitted by Phigros666 on
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Coherence & Cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction and main body paragraphs. However, a conclusion is missing, which weakens the overall cohesion. Always include a conclusion to summarize your main points and provide a final opinion.
Task Achievement
You have addressed both views of the topic, which is great. However, try to provide more specific examples and elaborate on each point to fully demonstrate your argument. Additionally, make sure to balance your essay by giving equal weight to each perspective.
General
Your sentences are clear and generally well-constructed, but vary your sentence structures to make the essay more engaging.
General
Be cautious with small grammatical errors and typos, such as 'individual’s actions' which should be 'individuals' actions.' Also, 'take public transportation' should be 'taking public transportation.'
Task Achievement
Your points are clear and relevant, but try to make your arguments more comprehensive by providing a few more examples or statistics where applicable.
Task Achievement
You have effectively discussed both views of the topic, which is a key requirement for this type of essay.
Coherence & Cohesion
The essay is easy to follow due to the logical structure of your arguments.
General
Your writing demonstrates a good command of English vocabulary and expression.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.