Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding change. Others, however, think that change is always a good thing. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion?
There are competing views on whether to make
changes
in life
. I believe that making a change is
may Unnecessary verb
apply
have
risky but it is way more beneficial in Verb problem
be
a
long term of Correct article usage
the
life
because people can get important experiences from changes
they made than they lose.
People Correct article usage
the changes
who
avoid Correct pronoun usage
apply
from
the Change preposition
apply
changes
because they
afraid Add a verb
they are
they were
from
the risks. Take, Change preposition
of
for example
, the shop owners do
not look for Correct pronoun usage
who do
new
marketing strategy because they may fear Correct article usage
a new
from
the Change preposition
apply
probablity
of bankruptcy. Correct your spelling
probability
However
, in a
long term, they will stay in one position and lose Correct article usage
the
from
the competition of Change preposition
to
economy
. Correct article usage
the economy
As a result
, other shops that have good strategy will win. In fact, as the billionaire entrepreneur Peter Thiel said, "in
a world that's changing so quickly, the biggest risk you can take is not taking any risk".
Capitalize word
In
On the other hand
, life
is short and it is boredom
unless we cannot make any Replace the word
boring
changes
in our life
because change is always good
thing because it is Add an article
a good
only
Correct article usage
the only
one
way to succeed in the long run. Correct pronoun usage
apply
For instance
, one of the super succeeded
Replace the word
successful
person
Mark Zuckerberg, when Change to a plural noun
people
he
was in Correct pronoun usage
apply
early
stage of his experiment of creating Add an article
the early
an early
Facebook
social Correct article usage
the Facebook
platfrom
. He said that "during that time I gave it a shot Correct your spelling
platform
everytime
whether I failed or not even Replace the word
every time
it
took a long period Correct word choice
if it
time
". I agree with Change preposition
of time
this
argument because if the person stagnent
for the sake of short-term comfort, they will be Correct your spelling
stagnant
guarenteed
to fail in the longer term and regret Correct your spelling
guaranteed
from
the past.
In conclusion, even though Change preposition
apply
changes
may have follow
with Verb problem
come
somehow
Correct your spelling
some
risk
, in the long Fix the agreement mistake
risks
run
people will benefit from the shift that they made. Add the comma(s)
run,
Therefore
, change is always good
thing and makes our Add an article
a good
life
more interesting.Submitted by baigalnarantuya1 on
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task achievement
Work on sentence structure to avoid occasional awkward phrasing and improve clarity.
task achievement
Provide more detailed and specific examples to support arguments.
coherence cohesion
Ensure logical flow between points for better coherence, maybe use linking words like 'furthermore', 'however', etc.
task achievement
The conclusion succinctly ties all points and reinforces the main argument effectively.
task achievement
Multiple viewpoints are discussed, showing a well-rounded understanding of the topic.
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